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Question 1:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I am not quite sure where to go with this question.
Please give me more information about the possibility of blessing between 1st Generation and 2nd Generation.

Thank you very much,
Curious Person

Question 2:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

Thank you for all your hard work. I really like the idea of this site. Its really wonderful. I just wanted to share my small dilemma with an elder, so I came here.

So anyway, I am in my first semester at college. I was just struggling a lot with loving and embracing this one girl I am friends with. She is really needy. She has a lot of struggles in her family. She is like this bottle thats being shaken up, and all this pressure is just building up inside her, ready to blast if given the opportunity to open her up. She talks in a really loud, forced, almost mechanical way, as if she has no sense of joy in her life, and she is just surrounded by stress, mostly due to her family. Everything that comes out of her lips is a complaint, if not its just useless comments that have nothing to do with anything.

Its hard for her to really listen to someone, since shes circling around all her own problems constantly. She is a sincere person, who has strong faith in Jesus and her faith. It is, however, different from that of her parents. Her mom is a devout Catholic, while her father is a devout Buddhist. I dont know how much that affects their relationship. But I do sense how unloved she feels in her family. Shes really suffering.

Anyway, its just so hard for me to love her. I know God lead me to her. In a way, I needed a friend, so having her as a friend did benefit me. But I find myself getting easily annoyed with her, and have a hard time staying nice. When I am with her, I try to serve her, and just stay patient. Its just hard, and I feel guilty if I ignore her when she goes on and on about her problems. And I have told her more than a few times, that I would appreciate it if she would try to talk about more positive things, if she could just try. It would help both her, and her listeners. And a few times I just snapped. I dont know how that is affecting her.

My mom suggested the best thing to do would be to relate with her solely on a spiritual child basis. I havent done much there. She suggested doing one on one DP reading with her. I havent yet gotten the will to do that yet. But I suppose it would help. Other than that, I feel like I might go crazy in this relationship!

If you read all the way to this point, then thank you for your patience. I think the best thing to do would be what I said, DP. Center the relationship. I guess I am just reluctant. And I am also not so centered in my life right now. Anyway, if you have any other suggestions, I would really appreciate it. Thanks for your time. God bless!!


Question 3:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I am a 2nd generation sister and my parents are working to find me a match. There is one brother that my parents said they were considering for me that I have had at least 5 very spiritual dreams that clearly express that we may be intended for each other. There have been matching conversations between our families, but the brother apparently does not feel ready to be matched right at this time. Still, these dreams keep coming that are very profound and very pure. I shared with my parents about the first two, but do not feel comfortable bringing up the dreams that continue to follow if I am unsure if the matching will be rediscussed in the future.

The dreams seem like a strong sign to me. Do you think it means that I should be waiting until he is ready? Should I be doing conditions so that he and his parents can receive such dreams? I am not desperately depending on this matching possibility to turn out to be my eternal Blessing, but it does seem to be too strong a sign to ignore.

Question 4:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

Hi, I plan to start an abstinence group on my college campus where I'm currently a student. I plan to model, in terms of functionality and programs/event as the bioethics meetings. (Discuss articles, topics...). Hopefully invite guest speakers on the subject of healthy relationships.

I've seen enough of what the misuse of love can do to a people and families.

My school is very liberal, though seems to have a Christian presence (bible study groups). I figure it's better to just get to the point rather than go through the entire bible 'study' program.

Any advice..? Or has anyone had success on other campus, not including CARP?

College student

Question 5:  
I am blessed but the relationship broke. I am still confused, because I thought that the blessing is for eternity. This one spouse forever, no matter whether we live together or not, in the spirit world we are considered one couple.

So how does it work when I go to another matching and blessing? Do I live with two men as my eternal spouses? Maybe it's a silly question that doesn't make sense... but it's still in my head.

What is really happening with the connection gained through the blessing on the spiritual level? I am unable to understand what really happens when it is broken by a spouse from this couple. They said I still remain blessed, but as a single. And I cannot quite understand this concept. I hope you can help to clarify those points as well... Anonym

Question 6:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I'm from Europe and 36 years old. My husband and I have been together for two years. We long to become parents but I didn't become pregnant yet. The results of the medical check ups of both of us are good and I have been to Cheong Pyeong last summer. I know couples who adopted children, but how can you ask another couple to do this? I cannot simply put an ad on the internet as it is such a sensitive matter. I feel a bit helpless.

Some tell us to wait (also our national leader) , but in the country where we live there is an age limit for couples who want to adopt and we are already close to this age.

We read books and I also went to a doctor for traditional Chinese medicine. She told me that my body is not warm enough and my whole system is low (low blood pressure, always tired etc.). She gave me some teas and told me to take warm baths. As we only have a shower I take footbaths. I have been doing this now for 9 months, but stopped with the teas recently as they are very expensive and I don't feel any effect on my body.

Thank you already in advance for your answer
Desperate Mom to be

Question 7:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

First, let me tell you, how happy I am about such a competition! My own blessed children are 12 and 8 years old, but I believe, that there is a big group of Spanish-speaking blessed children out there, who are eager to participate as well. Thats why I put your announcement into the international Spanish-speaking Forum of Jesús Gonzalez. Just for the record: are you considering Spanish-speaking entries or should they be translated into English? Translation takes away a lot from the original heart of the person expressing their thoughts, unfortunately. (Not always, but mostly).

I live in Argentina and my childrenand practically al the other blessed children around heredont speak any English yet. What are your thoughts?

With best wishes,
Dagmar Corales

Question 8:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

Thank you for starting this site, in particular for your heart in wanting to help people by answering questions that they may have been keeping inside them without knowing whom to ask.

I want to make a suggestion: that you re-organize the questions and answers so that the most recent question is always at the top of the page, and the earliest question is at the bottom. In months and years to come you will probably have hundreds of questions, and people won't want to scroll down through many pages to get to the new additions.

Otherwise, it is a beautiful site, very nicely designed!
I wish you success in this endeavor!

Renee Corley,

Question 9:  
Dear Rev. Carter,
I have just found your web site today and I wanted to know how private are the information given on the application. I would like to advise some people I know to go to your web site, but I would like to know more about your department, first.
Anne-Marie Mylar

Question 10:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I would like to ask you about my 36 month old son. He is so adorable, cute and very smart but sometimes he makes me spank him a little. I hate to do that because at the end of the day I feel so guilty about it but also, I don't want him to get hurt or hurt his little sister who is only 9 months old.

Sometimes he act very rude toward his sister, or when we go to the grocery store, he will run and sing loudly or play around and people have to stop their strollers to avoid hurting him. I feel so embarrassed by that. My husband has no patience with him when he acts badly.

I fight with my husband all the time because of that. I love my kids so much that since they were born I did not work; I do not want to take them to a babysitter. I decided to stay home and take care of them but now I am scared that our son will grow to be violent and full of anger toward others.

Would you please give us some advice?

Question 11:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I just found out about your website and I love it.
I just want to say welcome.
I have many questions to ask you.
Thank you and God bless you.
A bientôt!

PS: Is this site for everyone or just the 2nd generation?

Question 12:   Dear Anne-Marie,

When the 'black' Heung Jin Nim said that for spiritual reasons it is better not to practice fellatio, what are the reasons for it? I read several speeches, and I believed it has been allowed by Our Father, it is not?

Thank you.

Question 13:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I am retired '97. I was a member from '75 and spent several years on MFT from '77 to 79. I left in '80 but never lost faith in True Parents I just felt I could not do it, serious mental [spiritual] problems. I just made contact with the church in July this year after an experience I had while viewing Father's speeches on the internet. I e-mailed Damian and he sent me the address of a church leader here, I saw the brother and we made plans to start some businesses etc. he says that he does the matching himself, so I don't know about what is a matching staff? I live here on a tourist visa and I wonder if I should stay here or go back to the states. Maybe this is a question that can't really be answered for sure but I just thought you could give me your opinion. Thanks, often people have question they don't feel comfortable to ask their abel person or anyone for that matter.

Question 14:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I am an older brother considering entering into the next matching, I contracted herpes simplex 2 [ genital herpes] many years ago and though I no longer have had any symptoms for years I realize that I still carry it and will transmit it to my matching partner. What should I do? In a strange way for years I considered it a blessing since the horrible lip cold sores I used to get[oral herpes-simplex 1] completely disappeared, permanently after I contracted simplex 2.

Question 15:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

Do you think you can put a testimony on your site about how people can overcome relationships barriers (ie: S.T.F?) for both 1st.and second generation.

It's great that people come to expose their relationship with God and True Parents an to counter balance what can be found in some very ugly testimonies. Those who have doubts about True Parents, because negative books, should be made to realize, that their spiritual life should bear similarities to the life of True Parents and True Children, and those who are loyal to them.


Question 16:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

My name is M, with my spouse we are preparing for family life (next month). We are both, "inexperienced". There are some questions regarding which I am ashamed to ask central persons directly, questions about family life. Also our country is missing a meaningful family department and so answers from elders are absolutely not unified!

For example:
Love relations (bed)
love positions: some say that positions from back are not permitted (Satans style), some say it is OK.
oral sex
and some totally "rebelistic question" - anal sex (I and my spouse dont think about it, but some friends from another religion are asking and we are not sure)
during pregnancy
what do you think about the condition from father that husband and wife should sleep naked? My spouse cannot imagine this (it would be too cold)
Shaving: some parts - especially for women underarms
Thank you once again,

Question 17:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I was told that you could possibly answer my question. I was talking to a blessed sister who has a daughter in high school. She was quite upset over a situation that happened and that shook her daughter's faith. Here it is.

A BC boy approached the daughter and said, "Look in my hand - I am holding a CIG membership!!" The daughter looked and could not see anything. The boy replied, "It's a spiritual membership, and my parents paid $1000 for it"!!

The daughter reported this to her mother and asked what kind of church is this - that we are paying money for a spiritual membership? Have you heard of anything like this? Could this be true? Or was this a "story" that this boy was telling her? I would like to help set the matter straight so that the daughter can feel better.

Thank you,
Marcia Schlichting

Question 18:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

I was born in 1952 and joined the church in (and loving True Parents since) 1973, while serving in the U.S. Army. I am now the proud father of several Second Generation children from 13 year old down to 11 months. I'm curious -- what do you plan to teach Second Generation children about birth control, especially in light of True Father's guidance on the topic?
Best regards,
Anonymous from the Mid-Atlantic States, USA

Question 19:  
Dear Anne-Marie,

"I will be going to college this coming September. I am very strong in my life of faith and I know what I must do and not do but I am very nervous, if you have any suggestions I will truly appreciate them.

Anonymous BC girl