40 Years in America

Alice C. B.

Dan Fefferman and Davetta Morgan leading song practice at CARP's Snowmass Workshop, Colorado, August 1982.

After our first child, Tierson, was born on September 28, 1978 (Tierson, named after Frontier '78), we moved to Norfolk, Virginia. That was the first house that we had rented. Thomas worked as the controller for the seafood business at the time. We had a little nesting time there. I settled into the house in January and then in February we got the phone call from HQ that Father was going to be doing CARP in America. Tiger Park was coming from Korea, and all blessed wives were asked to serve, and sacrifice their families at this time. Even with a new baby I still had a frontline mentality. I still have that mentality; I hope I never lose it. I responded very quickly. I knew what the Japanese wives and Korean wives had sacrificed. I figured it was our time. Thomas had a harder time than me.

Thomas took care of Tierson for quite a while in Norfolk, with Betty Lancaster providing day care. She was a good mother figure for us. I went out on CARP with three days' notice. Mrs. Pumphrey and I went together to New York. She was from the 43 couple blessing.

We met Mother in New York and she took us out for dinner. Barbara ten Wolde, Carolyn Burkholder, Mary Simmons and others were there. There were other 1800- couple wives there also. Mother talked to me during that dinner. I wasn't the only one she talked to, but she didn't talk to everyone. She told us to take care of everybody in the field. She embraced us very much. I think she bought us some outfits, like a skirt, blouse and blazer jacket.

Then we were put on a bus to California. Father gave us a talk about CARP too, about the need to fight communism. We needed to make our offering, and pull out all the stops against communism. Carter was President then and not strong enough. We felt we were important and that Father needed us. I remember on the bus going out that emotionally we were ripped away from our babies.

My husband was there taking care of ours. Some people were still nursing and they were suffering with all this milk that we expressed into the sinks of the restrooms on the way out to California. We were making such a sudden sacrifice. Everyone was still in shock, kind of like being in the middle of war. We thought, we're in a war against communism, and all God has is a bunch of mothers and simple folk. Still we felt that we were in an important role.

Tiger Park met us for dinner when we arrived. He had such a warm personality; he made it easier for me. I can't speak for everyone else, but he made it possible for victory. Father knew he couldn't have an immature leader with people who were making this type of offering. Tiger Park was big enough. He and his wife had gone through this before us; we knew they knew what we were experiencing. They were wonderful and I loved him; we did all we could to support him. We moved from campus to campus, standing up to the communists wherever we went. We had verbal fights, and sometimes things got physical, which was scary. Tiger Park found out that I was loud and could talk for a long time, which he used to his advantage (my husband found that out too) during the rallies. Then I found out I was pregnant and I knew that I would have the chance to go home on maternity leave.

I had to speak out on Berkeley Campus and someone spit on me once. We got some powerful reactions, standing up to the liberals. I shouted my head off and let it all hang out! Tiger Park let me do it because he knew I had a loud voice. I supported him and I could be strong in that situation, maybe more than some wives. Some had serious health problems and it was hard for them. Some had no children and wanted them but now didn't have the chance to try. The grueling pace of things was difficult. It was a demanding, frontline schedule. God gave me a healthy body; I have been fortunate.

Once Tiger Park yelled at us for not preparing an offering table for an upcoming holiday. Some of the wives got negative at that, and couldn't deal with it. But we tried to help each other. Tiger Park knew when to yell and when to support. My husband loved him too.

When I got home almost nine months later, Thomas came to Boston from New York to meet us. Tiger Park gave us a $100 bill and said for us to go out to dinner. I never had an engagement ring or a wedding ring, so we bought that with the money instead. I still wear it.

The hardest time in CARP was the second half. We were told that the mission would last for three years. By the second year, it was getting old and wasn't very exciting anymore. The Halloween before Reagan was elected was a low point. I was fundraising. Everything we had done was to change the direction of America. Reagan was not a sure thing that night.

As I went up to the cars at the light with my flowers, all these people were in costumes. So many of them were satanic. It was frightening and depressing. I never felt so hopeless. I felt like, "Gee, I am on the edge here, begging money from Satan." These people were like Satan, laughing and grotesque. God was showing me hell, what He had to look at. I thought, this is serious.

I gave birth to Cara, and then 100 days later I was back out. I thought, I gave up my two kids, and it's not going to work, no matter what I gave up. I went and cried into my tea at a McDonald's. I connected with God through the tea, but I didn't fundraise anymore that night. This was a miserable night, no hope for America; it was too awful, too terrible.

But after that we witnessed on the street for the campaign, volunteering for the Republican HQ. When Reagan won, we felt it was our victory. We felt that CARP had really helped with the victory of the election.

Two years later we thought the mission was over. Father called us off CARP before the year was over. After Reagan was elected and inaugurated we got to go home. It was a victory like in the Star Wars movie. After that Father said, go do Home Church. Father stood me up and said, "Are you going to tell the other wives to go out and do what you did?" I hesitated, but I did try.

Then we came back to the Unification Church, from CARP. Thomas was back in New York. There were very few rooms back in the New Yorker. We felt like Mary and Joseph in the inn there. It was so crowded. We got two rooms in the New Yorker, but they weren't even adjoining rooms. We got back and no one knew what we had gone through. There was a loneliness there that was hard to share with people. We gradually settled in.

We then went to Washington, D.C. and moved to McLean, Virginia. One neighbor worked at the White House as a secret service agent. It was in 1988, the last year Reagan was in office. The agent called up one day out of the blue and asked if we would like to have tour of the White House. He said he would take us on a special tour. I thought about the other CARP wives of those days. I called Stephanie Huber. Reagan was just about to leave office. We piled our strollers into the cars, and the secret service man gave us a private tour with our kids. I think I told him I had worked for Reagan's campaign. He gave us one big exciting tour. He showed us the bulletproof vest Reagan wore and he let the children try it on.

We saw the Oval Office and the secret service office. Reagan was returning just then in a helicopter, and we stood on the lawn and welcomed him back in the house. We waved and he waved back.

It was such a wonderful experience, God's way of telling us that He hadn't forgotten our sacrifice. It didn't come from the church, it came from someone else. This was America's providence; God was working with Reagan, and my neighbor. Sometimes it was hard to see how God was working in other areas. But that took us out of our movement. CARP was part of the structure of our church movement proper. Father was trying to revitalize our whole movement then. Tiger Park never thought of people being "inside" or "outside" the church. Tiger Park was just very righteous, very natural.

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