Cheon Seong Gyeong – Sun Myung Moon

Book Three - True Love
Chapter Two - The Reality of Love
Section 4. Conjugal Love

4.1. Conjugal love is the flower of the whole universe

Man is a being having God's yang image, and woman is a being having God's yin image. A married couple is like the wrapping of heaven and earth in a cloth. They can feel the heart of God's ideal love. (13-67, 1963.10.17)

God is a being with dual characteristics vertically aligned, and human beings are physical beings with dual characteristics horizontally aligned. As such, the ideal of husband and wife is for the two to become one and form a completely rounded, apple shape. This would serve as a parent body able to pull and attach the ideal of love in the four directions, having the form of their four characteristics. (127-79, 1983.5.5)

When the husband and wife love each other explosively on the basis of the heart of loving God and loving humankind, God and the universe will be enraptured by this couple. This love cannot be anything other than that for the sake of God and humankind. Where does the root of this love lie? It does not lie within oneself. God is the source of love. He is the source of love for humankind. (35-239, 1970.10.19)

What is an ideal married couple? It is a couple who can realistically manifest the highest art and a couple who can manifest the highest literature. When we encounter the highest ideal and highest world of culture, we can see that the sweet love shared by a husband and wife is the highest love and the most sublime work of art in the world. The life of a husband and wife should be a most sublime work of literature; it should become the subject of a literary work. (22-269, 1969.5.4)

People always need stimulation. Happiness does not come without stimulation; there has to be stimulation. Just as our hunger makes each meal taste like something new, the love between husband and wife should always be fresh. The more the husband and wife see each other, the more they should long to see each other and want to be together all day. In light of this, you need to do a study on me and do a study on God. (23-57, 1969.5.11)

Establishing a family where God's love and the three great kinds of human love can blossom together is the desire of the world, the desire of humankind, and the desire of the future. You should know that the love of husband and wife is a precious and beautiful thing that can finally spread the fragrances of history in front of the principles of heaven and earth and appear as a new flower. (35-241, 1970.10.19)

Love is eternal. There are not two kinds of such love. There is just one. When a man and a woman are joined together in love, they must live together on earth for a hundred years, and even after they die they are to live together eternally. Although they have two bodies, they become one body, and as they rotate together they create oneness. When their two bodies become one, they come to rotate with God and establish a four-position foundation of love. This is nothing less than the ideal world. False love cannot invade; only true love can dwell there. (Blessed Family - 344)

A husband and wife who are joined together by the love in their hearts should create a family whose members' mutual affection has, through a lifetime of experience, surely gone beyond the sphere of their own daily lives. That love should merge without fail into oneness with God's purpose. Otherwise, they cannot enter the Kingdom of Heaven, the dwelling place of God. (35-179, 1970.10.13)

The perfection of the love of a man and a woman is the perfection of the universe. The day this love is shattered, the order of the universe will be destroyed and the entire vertical world will collapse. (Blessed Family - 544)

Through their becoming one in love as husband and wife, a couple attains the capacity to create in the same position as God, and their child is the result of that attainment. (52-314, 1972.2.3)

Heaven is looking for a husband and wife who are bound together as a pure man and woman and can represent heaven and earth with a passionate, crimson-colored heart of love. You should have such a love as a husband and wife and raise your sons and daughters in that love. (127-100, 1983.5.5)

The scene of a man and a woman hugging and kissing is one of the opposite poles of a flat plane colliding and generating the light that is to illuminate the path to finding love. When a white light appears there, colors should be added to create a light of colorful brilliance. You should know that when these lights are mixed by the vertical love of God, they will be transformed into a splendid, ideal world of brightness -- like the colors of the rainbow. (134-170, 1985.4.7)

In these times people everywhere are engaged in love that is like instant food. Love does not deepen just because you take a bath in a bathtub filled with its fragrance. I would say that the love shared by a couple from the countryside who wash in cold water before going to bed, is purer and becomes deeper with the passing of time. (Blessed Family - 353)

A bride and bridegroom should not unite through money, power or honor, but through the original love of God. They should create a family that loves God, with the wife living for the sake of her husband, and the husband loving his wife. (Blessed Family - 880)

A man is an incarnation of the True Father and a woman an incarnation of the True Mother. Therefore, when the husband looks down on his wife, he looks down on True Mother; and when the wife deceives her husband, she deceives True Father. (Blessed Family - 869)

The power by which the man can have dominion over the woman and the woman can have dominion over the man is love. No power other than love can enable them to take dominion over each other; only love has dominion. (Blessed Family - 344)

In terms of physical strength, women cannot match men, but when love is involved, the wife and the husband push and pull each other and become one. If a person becomes an object partner of love before God, will God like it? He will. (270-242, 1995.6.7)

The melody God likes most is the laughter of a husband and wife who are happy in their love for each other. When such a couple lives a life with the heart to embrace the world and accommodate the entire universe, that laughter will spring forth naturally. In God's eyes, the beautiful sight of such a couple would be like a flower. This is not just an ideal or abstraction. I am talking about the original world. (Blessed Family - 877)

A conversation between a loving husband and wife is more beautiful than any poem or painting in the world. Furthermore, how beautiful and splendid are the words that people who are in love exchange -- "just the two of us"! (Blessed Family - 887)

When a man and a woman receive the Blessing and experience joy while giving and receiving perfect love, God looks at this as if it were a flower that has bloomed on earth. Moreover, all things of harmony that come into being through their love are like fragrances to God. God dwells here as He wants to live surrounded by such beautiful fragrances. The foundation upon which God's love can enter is the place of love between husband and wife. This will be a place where all things of creation and the universe come into harmony. (Blessed Family - 887)

4.2. Conjugal love cannot be fulfilled if it is shared with another person

According to people's original nature, they do not want their partner's love for them to be divided. The completeness of the horizontal love relationship between husband and wife is destroyed if that love is shared; whereas, this is not so in the vertical love relationship between parent and child. This is because of the Principle of Creation, which mandates that the husband and wife attain absolute oneness in love. In love, people have the responsibility to absolutely care for their partner. (277-200, 1996.4.16)

If you are a couple that is bonded by the strong power of love, you should feel joy and have love for your partner no matter what he or she does. If a wife says that she hates her husband's smell, or a husband thinks or feels that he doesn't like the way his wife's body moves, this is because the couple has not realized complete love. Such a couple has come together for a certain purpose that is to their own advantage. (Blessed Family - 887)

When a husband and wife live together, they are happier if they experience hurricanes, rain storms and thunder as part of the ups and downs of life, and pursue the ideal of love while experiencing such diverse feelings, rather than living comfortably throughout their whole life. (167-212, 1987.7.19)

Rather than money or knowledge, we need love in order to solve the problems between man and woman. (161-293, 1987.3.1)

When you listen to people's voices, you will find that women's voices have a higher pitch than men's. Why were women's voices created to be higher pitched? In terms of physical strength women are weaker than men; but in terms of heart and affection women are higher. Then, what about men? Men love broadly. Women are higher in terms of the love for their husbands and children, but men have a deeper heart of love for their relatives and country. This is why we learn from our mother how to love our sons and daughters and our family, and from our father how to love the world. To lean too much to one side creates instability; a balance is struck by linking these two kinds of love together. (129-55, 1983.10.1)

In the first three years or so, you won't fit together well. How can a man and a woman with different family backgrounds, customs, and norms of propriety fit together? They should make effort to fit together until they become one. (Blessed Family - 895)

Only through love can greater things come forth... The level increases only through a love that lives for the sake of others. Therefore, fighting couples will produce children who will lead the nation to destruction. However, loving couples that live for the sake of others will produce God-like, wise princes and princesses who have extracted the full essence of heaven and earth. (204-106, 1990.7.1)

Why do a husband and wife fight? It is because each of them tries to receive love from the other. Those groups whose members try to receive love cannot last long. A family where everyone tries to receive love will be shattered, but a family where everyone tries to love others will not be shattered, no matter how much someone devotes himself to breaking it down. The love that each tries to give to others is eternal. (36-75, 1970.11.15)

Love is simple and foolish. It does not care about any situation. If I truly love someone, I am not concerned whether someone is watching us from the side. A love that is conscious about someone watching is a love within a certain limit. How simple and foolish is the love that does not care whether someone is watching. (33-113, 1970.8.9)

Economic difficulties cannot be allowed to create a rift in the husband and wife relationship. Neither knowledge nor ignorance can dilute the love of husband and wife. (Blessed Family - 880)

Heaven is looking for a husband and wife who, bound together as a pure man and woman, can represent heaven and earth with a passionate, crimson heart of love. (127-100, 1983.5.5)

Do you think the problem of divorce could come up between people who love each other? Considering the fact that those who have divorced or who want to divorce all once had a loving relationships transcending life and death, there is something wrong. There can be many reasons for divorce, but it ultimately signifies that something has changed -- something between two people. It happens because they fail to maintain and cultivate their love. Love itself does not change, but people's hearts change. (Blessed Family - 351)

In marriage relationships throughout the world, power comes when the husband earns and brings home money. The wife is naturally strengthened upon seeing the money he brings home, and the husband naturally gains strength seeing his wife so empowered. But if they are unable to earn money they become agitated, and their relationship may even break. A true husband and wife, however, should create oneness in love with God at the center. (Blessed Family - 880)

Some men, when they see a pretty woman, wish that she were their wife, even if he has his own wife. Of such a man with two minds, we say that he has a thief's disposition. Since it is Satan who started out with two minds, it is not wrong to call a man "Satan" who has two minds. If there is such a man, he is no different from Satan. (Blessed Family - 348)

A husband and wife can be considered a pair; however just as every face differs, people's fortunes differ. They have different destinies in life. Even if the husband has a bad destiny, if his wife has a good destiny, her destiny can change the husband's destiny for the better. Conversely, even if the wife has a bad destiny, if her husband has a good destiny, this can change her destiny for the better.

Therefore, we can say that the destiny of husband and wife is like creating level ground by tearing down mountains and filling up valleys. After creating level ground, they can plant trees, plough fields, and pursue a variety of plans for their love as they keep the ideals of husband and wife. From the standpoint of such principles, you should not just see the external appearance when you find your spouse. Marriage is a fearsome thing. (God's Will and the World - 543)

You thought you would be happy after meeting your husband, but there are bad times as well. You should not hope for good things only. Would it be good to be bathed in sunlight continuously for twenty-four hours? There must also be nighttime. Isn't it natural that something that is high comes down? (30-141, 1970.3.21)

A happy family is one where when the husband returns home he discusses with his wife everything that happened while he was out, and this reveals new things to pioneer. A happy family is one where they join their strengths and research together. When the parents do this, the children will contribute their strengths and join in with them, expressing their hope to build such a family. (29-113, 1970.2.25)

A loving husband and wife should not unilaterally stipulate and fix in their minds what their spouse's face should be like. If you imagine the face of your partner as having only one appearance, nothing could be more boring. When you look at your partner's face with joy, it will appear to be joyful; and if you look upon it with a loving heart, it will look beautiful. You should always see your partner's face as new, like that of water swirling when it flows with new shapes appearing at every turn. (Blessed Family - 880)

Human beauty does not just reside in the face. It can be seen and felt from all directions. Beauty is three-dimensional, like a ball. Whether seen from above, seen from the side, or seen from any direction, a person has his or her own perfect beauty. So you should not carelessly evaluate your wife's face. Many beautiful women are poor, but women who have virtue or good fortune are of a different type. We often see that even in the case of a woman with a pretty face, her face becomes strange after having just two or three children. So we can conclude that those who can maintain their beauty even after childbirth are beautiful women. (God's Will and the World - 543)

When a husband and wife love each other, each should love their spouse as a representative of God. When they love each other from a humanistic perspective, the shortcomings on both sides will come out, and this may eventually lead to their divorce. (Blessed Family - 880)

Love has value when people miss each other. In asking for love, use your mouth to speak and watch with your eyes open wide, so that you can please the one who gives love. You should know that if you remain dull, love will turn back on the path and run away. If a person giving love is not serious but has a passive attitude, how offended the other would be! (Blessed Family - 887)

If a husband and wife brush their teeth before kissing each other, this is not natural love; the toothpaste smell will keep them from being able to savor the unique human body smell. When I look at those people who brush their teeth before kissing, I don't know whether they are trying to taste love or taste toothpaste! When we look at the world these days, it is full of calculating, artificial, and hypocritical love to the point that we are confused about what human happiness is; such love is the main culprit leading the world to ruin. (Blessed Family - 353)

Miso soup tastes best when it is served in an earthenware bowl. The rough and thick taste of Miso soup is something you can never forget once you have developed a liking for it. Likewise, when people have developed a liking for the rough and thick flavor of love, they will never change. Just as you quickly get tired of instant foods, which are sweet, if you could get love easily anywhere like instant food, you would not be able to call it true love. (Blessed Family - 353)

Who do you think saw Adam and Eve dancing naked in the Garden of Eden? You can do such things when there is nobody around. When a husband and wife dance naked in the room, is this something to be concerned about? Between the husband and wife, who cares what they do, whether they dance naked or do other strange things? What does it matter when a husband and wife do it by themselves? (21-240, 1968.11.24)

Even pigeons call "Coo, coo, coo!" and rejoice together, so if there is a sound of a husband and wife's meeting, a sound of truly loving people meeting together, what kind of sound would that make? It would be no less than the sound of thunder. (Blessed Family - 887)

The loving words a husband and wife whisper to each other in bed become a tonic to dissolve all fatigue and hatred from the world. Among those words that you whisper, you cannot say, "You have to love me." Just as love is natural, the secret words of love should be tender and beautiful. (Blessed Family - 887)

When a husband and wife make love, even if the husband's father or mother may be sleeping next to them, it is fine even if they scream when they reach their climax. They should make everyone in the local villages know about their love, so they will say, "That couple is so much in love, and when they make that funny sound at night, village rats are shocked and roosters stop crowing." If someone asks why such an incident has occurred that shocks rats and causes roosters to stop crowing, you can say, "Why do you think? It is because of the shouts of love that shake heaven and earth!" (136-32, 1985.12.20)

The place of conjugal love is a flower of the whole universe. In the place where a newly married husband and wife, who appear as an encapsulation of the historical ages, become one, God comes and settles down. How solemn and fearsome an occasion is the first meeting of a bride and groom in the midst of love. When you think that you have created a path to God and take on the role of a complete minus in love, it is from here that the heat produced by the love of heaven and earth begins to increase. After you create a cozy environment for your life and the environment for your ideals, then you should go to your wife's room. (179-90, 1988.7.22)

These days you do not wear traditional Korean socks, but in the old days people used to wear them for months, until they had holes and the toes showed. Then they came to have all kinds of odors; but still to the nose of a loving wife, those odors were better than a nice fragrance. You will go and lick even smelly toes when you are in love. They will taste crisp, sweet, sour, and intriguing. When you measure like this using an antenna of love, the extent to which you like it will rise way above the extent that you dislike it. (194-49, 1989.10.15)

Is it easy to re-create your sons and daughters? You have to do all kinds of things to give birth to a new son or daughter, all the extreme things. So is the spit of your loving husband dirty or not? If your husband's spit gets on your palm, and you are wearing a silk dress and have no place to wipe it off, would you be willing to lick the spit off your palm or not? Speak honestly. You have to say "I want to lick it and swallow it" for it to be true love. Love knows no dirty things. (194-165, 1989.10.22)

When conjugal love catches fire, two lives become one and then the lineages unite and start boiling in love. In the midst of that, the owner plants the seed. When the male-life essence and the female-life essence meet this way, and through the combining of centrifugal and centripetal forces that are set in motion through love, everything will turn. Things go up and things go down... When a seed sprouts in an upward spot, it becomes a son, and when it sprouts in a downward spot it becomes a daughter! This is a theory, but I do not know if it is really true or not. Since this idea resonates with the theory, if you study it and find out whether it is really true or not, you will be a candidate for a doctorate or a Nobel Prize. (300-53, 1999.2.21)

Having children is the act of conquering the upper realm of God. This is an event to lead you to love your child from God's position and experience the inner heart of God and how much He loved human beings after the Creation. (224-28, 1991.11.21)

A love-centered life will solve everything. Even the tiger eyes of a greedy old man, when he is in love, will take on the shape of the moon as it is in a painting, and his frozen mouth will break into a smile. Love can completely melt down something that has been frozen and love can freeze something that is melted. Love is something that has the capacity to contain two extremes and still go further. If you look carefully at the Chinese character ho ("to like"), it combines the characters for "man" and "woman." There is a saying that a fight between husband and wife is like cutting water with a knife. When you cut water with a knife, does it leave a trace? It does not. Even after fighting, once a couple puts their foreheads together and smiles, peace returns. (127-245, 1983.5.15)

The love of husband and wife is for the sake of reaching up to God. (127-109, 1983.5.5)

Genuine love is to love with the entire body as one and with the heart and lineage as one. It is a husband and wife who can love like this. If there were no husband and wife in the world, would there be any excitement in living? (26-151, 1969.10.25)

Even in the fallen world, when a man and a woman fall in love, they say, "Ah, there is an electric current here." The electricity that arises from moment to moment starts from the archangel -- it is unicellular. The electricity of love that arises in the original world is the lightning of the love of the universe. It surpasses the former in strength several thousand times; moreover, the sound of the movement of the cells of each human organ is like the sound of thunder. The principle view of love is that the man and woman engaged in true love of the original world cannot meet God unless they concentrate all their might towards the contact point where the lightning of love meets. This is also the completion of the purpose of creation. (Blessed Family - 380)

Do you think God sees you making love or not? Would God, who transcends time and space, close His eyes at night, when the five billion people of the world make love? How would He feel when He sees them? How many good wives and good husbands are there? Think about it. All kinds of things should happen there. Reluctantly playing a wife's role, reluctantly being dragged along, reluctantly trying to please your spouse -- you should not live like that. That is not love, is it? Is that life? How great it would be if the whole world turned into an environment where butterflies and bees flew around freely and we could live in harmony within heaven and earth according to God's ideal of creation -- just as in the Garden of Eden, with the fragrance of flowers -- so that God could fall asleep in bliss? Have you ever thought about this? Try living like this. (222-252, 1991.11.3)

Why don't women have beards? When God saw Adam with a long beard, He was not pleased; so when He made Eve, He made her without a beard. So what is the greatest masterpiece among all God's creation? It is women. Women are the greatest masterpiece, but who are they for? They are a great work of art for men. Think this way. (38-180, 1971.1.3) 

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