The Words of the Sedehi Family

Whom Does a Boy Learn from to Be a Man?

Shahram Sedehi
June 10, 2012


Sun Myung Moon

Whom does a boy learn to become a man, from his father or from his mother? Perhaps, you would answer the father? is it because he has the same type of sexual organ as the boy has?!

Yes sexual organs do give us an absolute identity as male or female, however those organs don't actually make us man or woman. We actually have to grow into our potential as man or woman. Especially as teenagers we experience that about our sexual identity.

So a boy learns manhood from his dad, not by how the dad interacts with other males; rather how he interacts with women, such as the mother (dad's wife), his sister (aunt), the daughter (boy's sister).

True Parents say that, manhood is only defined in terms of the true love a man has toward a woman and vice versa. Thus for a boy to learn about manhood, he learns through how his mother treats his dad and how his dad responds.

So a boy learns manhood from his dad, not by how the dad interacts with other males; rather how he interacts with women, such as the mother (dad's wife), his sister (aunt), the daughter (boy's sister).

In past fallen history, men have taught their boys how to be a "man" by taking them to do the "manly" stuff with other males. However, I would call that, "archangelic training" or at best "male training". And indeed the boy needs that, however, that does not teach him how to be man, but how to be a good archangel.

Any training in the family that does not involve the interaction of two sexes, is actually "archangelic". So when we say, son you need to work hard if you want to be man of the house, it is not correct. What makes him a man is how he treats his future wife and daughters.

Being a hardworking individual is creating the archangelic foundation to be able to stand as an Adamic family. And the task of providing for family (restoring all things) can be accomplished by any sexes in the family. Now a days women are often fulfilling that role of providing for the family, but does that make them a "man"? No manhood and womanhood has nothing to do with with what type of task we accomplish, but how we love the opposite sex in the family, as we learn from the interaction of our father and mother toward each other. 

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