The Words of the Sedehi Family
Sun Myung Moon, September 20, 2011
What defines a marriage? My answer is "Having Absolute Sex". Hence, we, Unificationists, start our Blessed marriage life together with the 'holy three day making love ceremony'. As Dr. Schnarch, author of the book "Passionate Marriage", says: "Marriage prepares you for marriage"! When we make yogurt out of milk, what do we use to make more yogurt? It is by saving a bit of the yogurt and applying it to more milk!
In popular culture, it is believed "free sex prepares you for marriage"! However, that is not a sustainable system; meaning, if the marriage relationship (especially in bed) gets weak at times, one or both partners needs to go have more sex outside of the marriage, in order to "re-prepare" themselves for the marriage! A flower grower, once he has his first harvest, he saves the seeds for the next planting. But, what if he, repeatedly, threw away his seeds from his harvest, and repurchased more, then, he would cease to become self-reliant!
Therefore, absolute sex is an absolute sustainable system. Then why, we had, in the 90's, an unusually high rate of Unificationists couples moving out of absolute sex system?
The reason was many couples did not realize the true value and significance of the offering of 'holy three day making love ceremony', as they started their family life.
Many have criticized this Unificationist practice, saying, the couples, with very little emotional commitment toward each other, were made obligated to do the ceremony; why not let the couple start making love when they want to. And, many Unificationists would defend, "it is the spiritual commitment that enforces the sexual commitment!"
On the contrary, I believe emotional, and spiritual commitments in the Blessing of marriage comes from the sexual commitment, we initiate at the 'Holy three day ceremony". To have fidelity in marriage, which is a spiritual commitment, can only be established through the strong sexual connection between the couple.
Marriage means sex and sex means marriage! If we say that marriage means spiritual commitments, that means being spiritual is being married! That's like saying there is no difference between a nun's spiritual 'marriage' to God and a Blessed wife marriage to her Blessed husband, centered on God! Even if we say emotional commitment is marriage, then that means I am married to anyone that I have an emotional connection with, such as my own mother, sister, so on!!!
Marriage means sex and sex means marriage. If sex is not absolute, it will disappear as a form of relationship altogether for both those that believe in marriage, or those who do not!