The Words of the Beutl Family

Understanding the heart of Hyun Jin Nim (Part 1)

Nikolaus Beutl
December 4, 2009

My dear brothers and sisters,

In the August 2006 edition of the Today’s World magazine a precious testimony by Kwak Jin-man was published under the title “Growing Up with True Children”. Jin-man shares in it about experiences he had with True Children, especially with Heung Jin Nim and Hyun Jin Nim.

In the beginning of his testimony Jin-man mentions that Hyun Jin Nim and some of the other True Children occasionally tell people in the first generation, “You know, I was right there on the frontline with you.” or “The True Family is always on the frontline.” and he adds: “Sometimes you may not know what that means, but I personally experienced and saw what True Children went through.”

How well do we understand the hearts of True Children and the course they had to walk as direct children of the True Parents of Mankind? Are we aware of what they went through internally until now?

About the persecution they faced at school Jin-man notes: “When you are older and can make sense of the world and put pieces together, you are able to understand; you can rationalize and somehow cope with it, but not when you are a little kid and this is your reality. It’s a very difficult situation to cope with, especially when you are young. When the True Children say that they were on the frontline, I know for a fact that is the case.”

Jin-man talks in the first part of his personal testimony about experiences with Heung Jin Nim, whom he sees as having a quiet character: “He seemed introverted. He was also very kind and warm-hearted. He always took care of the abandoned kids, those kids that no one else wanted to associate with. He took them into his fold and took care of them; I remember that from school.”

About the difficult position True Children are in he explains: “I know another way that they stood on the frontline. In the Divine Principle, the central figure, the core axis that God’s providence works through, is the one who is liable to be attacked, because if Satan can eliminate or damage that person, the providence is prolonged. That is how Satan has been able to expand and continue his influence over the fallen world.

The frontline is close to God’s central figure, to True Parents and their immediate family, where Satan’s total focus and attention is always targeted. True Parents meant for the Cain children, the first generation, as well as the second generation to be a protective layer to prevent the situation of a direct attack. Satan will do anything to get through.”

Can we realize this important fact deep in our hearts? If we do, then we will surely be dedicated to protecting the True Family at the risk of our own lives. That Heung Jin Nim showed an exemplary attitude in this respect is well known.

Concerning Heung Jin Nim’s death Jin-man mentions the basic understanding at that time: “We never imagined that a True Child would become an offering, a sacrifice. When I heard about the accident, we went to Belvedere to the rock for a prayer vigil, though it was very cold. Even as I prayed, the thought of Heung-jin nim passing to the spirit world almost never crossed my mind, even though we’d heard he was in critical condition. We thought that among the True Children, in the True Family, that was an almost impossible scenario.”

After explaining about how serious Heung Jin Nim was about protecting True Parents Jin-man told his audience: “I know Heung-jin nim and the other True Children are always going to be on the frontline. I never imagined Heung Jin Nim going to the spirit world or that any of the True Children would ever be attacked in that way. I remember very vividly that all of our Unification movement was in repentance; it caused a total re-examination of the internal state of our Unification family… you parents probably remember how it was; you remember how powerful our recommitment was, right? All of us in the Unification family pledged and promised, ‘This will never happen again.’ I remember there was a collective sense of urgency. It was a wake-up call. You and I remember the state of mind, the heart of utter repentance.”

And still it happened again and again and again with more children / grandchildren of our True Parents having to go to spirit world prematurely -- due to our not uniting fully with the True Family and God’s desire for us.

Jin-man emphasized an essential point: “Let me say this and speak out very clearly: If True Parents are True Parents, True Children are what? True Children. When Hyun-jin nim first said in public, ‘True Parents are my father and mother and Heavenly Father is my grandfather,’ it kind of surprised me. Can you imagine calling Heavenly Father, ‘Grandfather’? Can you imagine? Of course it’s natural, but at the moment, it shocked and surprised me.

I know our movement, especially when Heung-jin nim went to the spirit world, went through a recommitment and revival, but somehow over the years, that has become more and more distant. When Young-jin nim went to the spirit world, I didn’t have a direct experience, but I remember repenting so much.”

Do we all repent when we hear about another tragedy in the True Family or do we feel that this is not directly related to me and my behavior?

Jin-man asked the ones listening to his testimony: “Do you know Shin-yea nim? Do any of you know Shin-yea nim? She is the third daughter in Hyun-jin nim’s family. I remember when Shin-yea nim passed away. It was during Hyun-jin nim’s second twenty-one-day workshop. In 2001, with the mandate given by True Parents, he held a series of twenty-one-day workshops under the title, ‘Creating the New Paradigm of Leadership,’ when he was trying to wake up our movement, when he was trying to put the Unification house in order.”

Jin-man shared a few details of Shin Yea Nim’s passing into the spirit world, which I will not all quote here but I would like to emphasize that it was at the time of these important workshops to wake up our movement that this precious True Grandchild had to go to spirit world as an offering. Shin Yea Nim suddenly got a high fever, was brought to the hospital emergency room, and passed away.

“I remember that Hyun-jin nim just ran into the hospital. In the room, there were very few people, and I saw Jun-sook nim was still holding Shin-yea nim in her arms. She could not compose herself. Of course, as you can imagine, Hyun-jin nim’s heart was also aching, but he had to try to calm Jun-sook nim down. For them to have a private moment, we stepped out and closed the door and they had a prayer of offering.

I kept asking myself, ‘Why? Why does this kind of situation happen again and again, and why can’t we prevent it?’ I know that it’s not in any way Hyun-jin nim or the True Family’s fault. I know the many situations and circumstances we, the Unification Church, had a lot to do with, especially at that period of time.

Actually, Hyun-jin nim and the other True Children and True Father as well as do not like to explain or to share the painful part of their hearts, right? They would rather not talk about it, but actually, Hyun-jin nim scolded me and the other CARP leaders about our mentality. He asked us, ‘Why does it always take the True Family’s suffering and tragedy to make you realize what your responsibility is?’ I remember vividly.

He explicitly told me, ‘I don’t like you to just be stimulated by those kinds of things. What should stimulate you is not the agony of True Parents and the True Family, but the fact that they’re standing there, the fact that I’m leading you and the fact that True Parents are still leading you on the frontline. That should stimulate you. That should be more than sufficient to fuel you. It should be a sufficient motivator for you to fulfill your portion of responsibility. Why does it always take unnecessary sacrifice that should not take place for you to wake up and understand?’”

This question by Hyun Jin Nim sadly remains valid until today because generally we did not really resurrect in heart to the level of being fully aligned with True Father Parents and their Family for which Hyun Jin Nim was been fighting so hard, sacrificing so much.

In March 2008 even Hyo Jin Nim had to go to spirit world, leaving Hyun Jin Nim in the position of the eldest son of the True Family here on earth. Father called at that time first of all for the unity of our worldwide Unification Movement, but tragically we did not respond well so that another incredible sacrifice became necessary -- the helicopter incident, a crucifixion that could be turned into a victory of substantial resurrection.

But in the end we did really wake up fully in summer 2008 to begin a new life based on a new foundation of faith and foundation of substance as we have been asked to establish. Depending on the individual, there have been certain inner changes at that time but on the whole we did not become a Unified Family of brothers and sisters who love and support each other beyond any borders.

What happens when the ones who are supposed to respond to God’s will do not follow the desire of Heaven? More sacrifices become necessary, even the shedding of blood as our True Father said at the end of August this year. This became most sadly also a reality on the physical level.

But there is also the internal realm of heart -- blood having to be shed -- in the True Family due to disunity that has its origin in the attitude of leaders and members in our movement. I wrote about it extensively and I want to emphasize it here again: That the real origin of the suffering and heartbreak for True Parents and True Children lies in us as members of their extended family who are not well united with God’s dispensation and with one another.

Jin-man said in this respect in his testimony: “Hyun-jin nim expects us to be mature enough, after years and years of guidance from True Parents, to wake up and not to need that kind of unnecessary stimulation. The reason I am telling you about these things is because True Parents and True Family and now the True Grandchildren and so forth stand in the vertical axial line, in which they are the providential axis. That is the focal point. That is where the ultimate victory of God or Satan is determined.

The past, present and future will converge at that point. The Cain children of True Parents are supposed to be protective layers, to unite with True Children and create the necessary foundation upon which the True Family can stand, and thereby prevent attack and invasion from Satan directly into the True Family. You understand that, right?”

My dear brothers and sisters, do we realize how true these words of our brother Jin-man are? Can we feel in the depth of our hearts that we are supposed to be protective layers through our unity with True Children, creating the necessary foundation upon which the True Family can stand protected from Satan’s invasion?

Because this point is most crucial I asked in recent reflections to have a look at our own inner reality in order to make sure that I am truly united in heart with our True Parents and aligned with the vertical axis which Hyun Jin Nim emphasized a lot through the alignment workshops about which I reported to you in detail last year.

Let us take the testimony by Jin-man Kwak close to our hearts and truly wake up to realize in what kind of decisive position we are as the ones who are supposed to be a protective layer around the True Family.

When we hear about difficulties in the relationship between True Children then we should not look at them and maybe even judge one or the other True Child but have a close look at ourselves with the question: Did I fulfill my responsibility to be one in heart with True Father and True Mother -- with God’s heart that is manifested through them?

In other words, now is not the time to talk about problems in the True Family but to really check my own reality to make sure that I truly love my brother and sister centered on God’s will. True love towards others includes helping them to realize what they are doing wrong and showing them the right way to go. This is surely not a pleasant task, but Hyun Jin Nim has surely invested himself so much for the sake of bringing our Unification house in order as Jin-man called it.

Continued in part two 

Table of Contents

Tparents Home

Moon Family Page

Unification Library