The Words the Hose Family
The Intermingling Of Heart In Daily Life
April 26, 1996
Good morning. I am reminded of the morning that you two had such a stormy argument. Your hearts werenít at all together, and I came and we could share very deeply. In fact, it became very good communication between us. This morning while there is no argument, there is not so much to talk about between the two of you. And so, I want to take this time and share with you about making room for the other person in your own thought.
In this world there are very few truly good friends, because as you go through your daily life youíre going to find only a few people who can truly in their hearts recognize the things that you value very deeply. Youíll find many people you can talk to and share with to an extent, but to find a true and special friend is, like a diamond, a rare thing.
It would seem that any husband and wife, after living together for many years, should be able to have a true friendship, but if you recognize the reality of this world, both of you can see very clearly that thatís not necessarily true. To be able to share most deeply together is not just automatic to marriage, even though day and night, year after year you may live together. Friendship is a rare thing even in marriage.
Long after the hot romance is cooled and after the children are grown, there are marriages that are just barely holding together due to a sense that they donít want to divorce or walk away from one another because of all the pain that it will cause the children and the other person. But this is a very poor way to carry on a marriage or a relationship, wouldnít you say? To build a true friendship with your partner, your lifelong and eternal partner, is important in this world. Thatís why Iíve asked that before I come and speak to you, you two take the time to share.
Whether you are expecting anything from Me or not, you need to take the time and just share. Not always about financial problems, not about this or that external obligation, but just share whatís in your heart. Thatís an important thing, because in doing that youíll come to appreciate more and more one another and what youíre building together. The sum of one plus one is not just two; itís a bigger one, coming together in a deeper sense. Thatís truly the bond of marriage. In the spiritual realm, in the eternal world you do not have bodies, but you have the intermingling of your hearts to carry you through eternity. And that intermingling is far too rare in this world today.
One of the real demons of modern culture is the television set because it has pulled people away from sharing deeply as they would at one time. I know that at an earlier time in history there were evenings when families would sit and there would be stories told, and there would be experiences from the week shared back and forth, father to mother, parents to children, mother to father, children to parents. What a beautiful thing! There is no greater treasure than the daily life and experience of the individual.
And so, when many people go on to the spiritual world they look back and they feel very lonely because what they take with them into the spiritual world is not memories about TV shows but how many people did they really mingle with in heart in the deepest sense. And, for those of you who have spent your life trying to live out a Godly purpose, this is a question that you have to face long after the mission and the shoes have been worn out from running here and there on the earth. The question that you enter your older years with is: Who really knows me and whom do I know? Who really embraces me and whom do I embrace, beyond any ups and downs, beyond anything?
This is a very important part of the Kingdom of Heaven. Many people donít realize that. When they look at the Kingdom of Heaven they think everything will be covered by God and by Christ, but truly there is to be glory in each and every life. And itís not just glory coming from above. Itís the glory of life itself and really coming to a consciousness of that shared experience of life, with your family, with those around you, being able to fully and deeply mingle in heart. I told you a long time ago, all I ever wanted was a family.
If you think of a big family in a big house in the most ideal sense, sure there may be arguments and struggles, especially among the little ones, but the most beautiful thing in a family is the sharing that goes on, the intimacy that goes on not only between husband and wife, not only of a physical nature or a romantic nature, but truly on all levels and in all moments, that feeling of being able to be free with those around you, totally free.
The time that you two take to sit down and really share together is not easy to find, I know, because of the tension of your daily schedule and the struggle that you have to establish yourselves practically, financially, in the more daily way. But please realize that these times that you spend with Me are also times that you spend with each other. Thatís My concern as your Father and Mother. Do you see?
When you look, in the larger sense, at religion, there are people who are willing to give up their lives and will bravely proclaim their willingness to die for God and the Messiah, but oftentimes, Iím sorry to say, have become cold to the person next to them. Not only husband and wife but the people around them who are claiming that same kind of faith. And that is not enough to establish the Kingdom. In history, those who are willing to die and give their lives for Me could oftentimes turn around and brutalize their brothers or sisters in the worst way.
Thatís why itís a very incomplete understanding. And, again, if they ask Me what is My heart, My heart is not just that I be loved, that you and I form a deep bond or relationship together, but that truly in your life you reach out to others from the deepest part of yourself and express the love that you want to offer to Me. That liberates Me also because I work through -- and not to sound too scientific here -- but I work through circuits, through the network of heart that Iíve talked to you about. Thatís the way the Kingdom can blossom and bloom.
Some people talk about being vertical or horizontal. Those are words I often hear passed back and forth among those of you who follow the Unification Principle. But I tell you there needs to be a balance. The fulfillment of the vertical is in the horizontal. The fulfillment of the horizontal is in the vertical. Itís more of a circle that we speak of here. So never criticize whoís too vertical or whoís too horizontal because that may be a wonderful strong point in that brotherís or sisterís nature, and through the process of growth they will learn to balance that nature. So, if someoneís going to criticize, they had better look at their own life first and realize the value of that circular approach.
Coming back to where you are now, isnít it true that these talks are now going out to quite a few people? That network of heart is not just for those people, individually, to have a wonderful realization of Me or of the eternal things in their lives, but ultimately to bring them together, too. You can share your hearts and share the things that are the deepest desires you have. You can come together and express that common brotherhood and sisterhood as the family of God. And donít you feel that, as people respond to the talks that have been sent out?
Yes, I am building a network in so many ways and so many places, wherever there is an open heart. The work of restoration has come a long way down through history, in ways that go far beyond the lectures that are presented by your movement. I work in millions and millions of ways that are unknown, but beyond that, this is a time for that network to be not only an unconscious network but to be one in which communication is opening up for the sharing of hearts. The future of this world depends on that network and on how well what youíve often called the spirit of God, what I would call more the relationship of parents and children, how well that can flow among you.
There will be suffering, and there is suffering now in terms of people who have been caught up in the evil of hatred or prejudice or struggle against their brothers and sisters, and that must come to an end. But there must be something already building to push out that hatred and to drive away that prejudice and that separateness that has earmarked all of human history. There must be something building to develop that.
The vision that has come through Unificationism is very, very important because it has given a road sign for the future. It has shown and spoken of the meaning of the Kingdom of Heaven, going beyond any particular religious group. But saying it and doing it are two different things, and doing it comes down to each and every individual.
Doing it is not just an action; it is an awareness. As you are aware, even within your own marriage, within your own family, the day-by-day path is not an easy one. Within one home there are many complications and many things that want to pull you away from yourself day by day. Whatever the vision, whatever the great hope in the abstract, to make it a reality is the greatest challenge. And that is the challenge now in all of history.
I am not looking for more "isms" at this point, more and better doctrines. Much has been given. Now is the time that the training and the development of the individual heart is truly needed to bring the consciousness into the belief so that the being, ultimately, of each and every individual may supersede the belief. People have believed many things down over the centuries. Belief is an easy thing because it doesnít demand responsibility. You can say you believe in God, but what does that mean in terms of your daily life?
Whatís the translation in terms of your relationship with others, in terms of how you regard yourself? This is the important thing. And, of course, many have spoken of ethics and morals, but, again, oftentimes those become a belief. You believe people should behave a certain way, but in daily life even those who have expressed very powerful beliefs in a certain moral and ethical structure, not to speak of Me, have still fallen down and created a mess in their own lives and the lives of others. It is not enough to have strong beliefs or strong convictions alone. It is so important that you learn how to come into the realm of the heart.
And Iíll bring up a point here that I donít always speak about but which is very important: Why is it necessary to come into the realm of the heart? Because the heart deals with now, this moment, not some abstract day next week or something that happened long ago. It deals with this moment, because your heart is where you meet Me, and I am real in this moment. I am not real tomorrow or yesterday; Iím either a hope or a memory perhaps, but in this moment is where you must live, taking this step on the road.
And if there is a hole in front of you, you must see it clearly. Self-control, responsibility, these things are very important. They are important not just in the military sense, but in your daily relationship with Me because it is there, in your moment-by-moment relationship with Me in your very deepest heart, that you can go beyond yourself and begin to take control of a life that is otherwise pushed around and blown around by storms, many storms, large and small. This is what Iím calling for and this takes a lot.
There are those who want an easy answer. For example, in Christianity it is an easy thing to say, "Jesus died for my sins; Iíve been forgiven and Iím going to Heaven." That is such a nice answer. But what about your life, the 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 years that are left? Is it enough to simply hold that?
If anything, great acts of forgiveness engender a greater responsibility to live a great life. Little children will feel joy at their parentsí forgiveness but will go out and make more mistakes. But truly great souls, when they realize the meaning of forgiveness, will reflect very deeply on their responsibility. They have simply been given another chance to live a life which is truly and deeply responsible.
I know that when both of you came to Me in the beginning, several years ago, you felt even without My speaking it, a very deep sense of forgiveness. I had seen all. I had known all that passed before. You knew that My focus was not on condemning or criticizing or on any kind of belittling of you, but that I wanted to go ahead and make something true and real and profound with you. And you know that remains the purpose, and so itís a daily path.
So, I ask you to really work on these things and donít be afraid to open your heart fully to Me day by day, even in the most mundane activity, because I am always here. I am with you and if you have the One who is your true friend with you, then you can go through anything. Thatís what gives life meaning. Up or down, good or bad, when you carry with you that heart with which you feel a very special link, you can face it all. And so, it is with our relationship and, ultimately, as I look at the two of you, with your relationship together. You will know, if you went away from one another for one year, how valuable that relationship is.
I wanted to share these things this morning because I think that, in their day-by-day lives, oftentimes My children forget. They get caught up in the many outer responsibilities that they have. Itís not a matter of becoming inactive and just sitting and meditating anymore. It is truly a way of bringing the inner into the outer and giving it great meaning and proportion. So think about these things.
And to those who read these talks later on, I ask you to examine your marriages, your families, your friendships, your own heart. What is your pattern? What is your daily way of living? And if you call out to Me and proclaim the absolute willingness to give your life for Me, for Christ, then I ask you to look at the person next to you.
Iím going to leave it at that this morning and I thank you, because the two of you did communicate this morning, even though it wasnít all soft and cuddly. You made a place for Me to share something that is so important. Letís finish and Iíll ask W [wife] to pray.