The Way for Young People
by Rev. Sun Myung Moon
Section 5. The Practices of an Exemplary Life [Part 1]
1. The Model Of Life: You Have To Be Exemplary In Life
1) The Main Meal
When I recently observed you cooking, you made a lot of things and discarded much. It is not good. You must only make as much food as you need. If two persons are to eat, then you should make food for two persons and eat all that you made without leaving anything behind. You should make that kind of preparation neatly. In other words, there are many of you who waste food. Also, you are always eating. You should eat food at meal times. You must not eat at other times. You may drink water. We should be like that. We should save things by all means in order to help our neighbors and help foreign countries. That is important.
2) Side Dishes
Next, about side dishes. What is your main dish and what are your side dishes? Desert may be a side dish. Fruits are side dishes. Do not waste them in the refrigerator and open the refrigerator and eat. That is no good. You should eat when you have to eat, at the right time. You have to discard your habit of eating other than at mealtime. That way of living it not good for the health. It is bad for the health.
Also, I don't want the members of the Unification Church to eat apples or other things while walking on the street. Even animals don't eat while walking. They eat their food at one place and then go to another place. Where are the animals that eat food while walking? Human beings are the lords of all creation. Do eagles eat while flying? Do other birds eat while flying? But when I came to American society, Western society, I saw many people eating in public. This is not the case in the Oriental world. That is not good. You should eat when you have to eat, but not until mealtime, even if you are hungry. This kind of training is also good for the health. This way of living, these eating habits, are the secrets of longevity.
You should eat in the morning and then, when you feet hungry, you eat lunch. In the evening, you should eat dinner. But, in your case, you are eating 24 hours a day. When you eat, does it seem delicious, making you feel good? That is not a good custom, and it is not good for the health, either. I have to teach even this kind of thing do you understand? I don't eat even if I am served side dishes or fruits. I dare not eat them. Even if those things are brought to me, I have a look, but I don't eat. I am doing that. The bananas become dark, so they cannot help but take them away. But when I see that, I think of the fundraising members, and I think of the Africans who are starving to death. "How can I eat those things?" I think that way. That kind of life is necessary.
You should eat meals at the right time. When your stomach is full, you feel like not eating any more. In that case, even if fruits are brought, you should not eat. You should eat them at the next meal. When you feel thirsty, drink water. Here people always drink ginseng tea. You should drink water. But if you drink a lot of water, you want to go to the bathroom, and then you waste water. How much of a loss for the nation is it? The more water you drink, the more often you have to go to the bathroom, and you flush away a lot of water many times a day. This is a great loss for the nation. It is a terrible thing. I am sorry to say this, but I make it a rule not to flush, even if I urinate, as much as possible. I mean I flush only after I urinate two or three times. I think that way. When I think of the people in Africa and many poor people, Americans must save as much as possible. If each and every American saves one dollar a day, it makes 240 million dollars. It's a huge amount. Do you understand what I mean? One day Mother complained to me, "Why don't you flush after you urinate?" But I flush water after I urinate twice. That does not make the bathroom bad or make the toilet dirty.
If you do these things daily, how much water you can save! Think about it. It is an enormous amount of water. You should think in that way. If you don't flush after urination, don't feel bad about it. You should think more constructively. You should think it's all right even if you urinate in the morning and flush only in the afternoon. It's O.K. Instead, you can keep the toilet clean by cleaning more than once in several days. If Americans do that, how many resources can they save? Rather than the poor people, the people from the rich countries in the world should be encouraged to do this kind of thing.
I don't support the idea of taking a bath every day. It is not good for the health, either. I make it a rule to take a bath once every three days. I take a bath only when I cannot help it, when I have been shedding a lot of sweat. How much water do we consume by taking a bath every day? Is it good? It's not good. It is bad for the health. You may say, "Oh! Father is a barbarian." But it is O.K. You may say so. In the Garden of Eden, God, Adam, and Eve were all barbarians. Did they have a bathroom in those days like we have today? Did they have paper? They had nothing. Therefore, you should feel grateful for all those things, and you have to be like that in everything you do. You have to save this world by doing so. This kind of thinking is good. By thinking in this way, you can become the kind of people who can always think about the world. Centered upon daily life, you should know that it is absolutely necessary to have this kind of ideological thinking. Do you understand? Am I wrong? Is what I say acceptable or not? If you don't like it, you can quit.
You must be exemplary in everything; you should be a good model in everything. If you eat good food and have a luxurious life, you should save things. You should only consume those things that you absolutely need. That kind of life is a good example.
On Sundays, I dress well publicly because I cannot help doing that. But other times I spend time without a tie as much as possible, and I try to use simple things like sweaters. Think about how much neckties cost in Western society. If you include necktie pins, how much does it cost in all?
There are those who think about the world and spend all their life with no tie, and there are those who live their lives with ties without thinking about the world. When those people die and go to spiritual world, which one will go closer to God? It is obvious, you understand? So, that kind of life is necessary.
Right now, I wear these old shoes which have been put in storage. Even if I say so, is there anyone that says that Reverend Moon is a bad person? If the Unification Church members say, "Oh! Father, you are wrong," the Unification Church of those people will decline and perish. How about you? Do you think that what I am saying is good or bad? It is a precious thing to live thinking about the world.
Therefore, when you eat meals, you should eat enough at meal times. Of course, I am not giving an order to you every time. When you have to eat, by all means, eat. I don't say it is a sin to eat. It's O.K. that you eat. But it's good for the health to maintain that kind of habit. If you get accustomed to that way of living, you feel comfortable as well.
When you fast, you realize how slowly time passes. Why? Because it means that you spend a lot of time having three meals a day. If you are constantly opening the refrigerator door and eating an apple, or drinking a Coke, how much do you consume spiritually? It is necessary to get accustomed to eating only at meal times. If you do so, you will not get sick. Your life will become healthier. If a man has that habit of eating often, the woman should guide him and pull him so that man also lives in a healthy way. In case a woman has a bad habit, the man should guide her so that both have a healthy standard of living.
Next, we will talk about beverages. The United States has the most beverages in the world. You must make a decision in advance about how many bottles of beverage you drink a day. From now on, when you drink a beverage, those who have heard Father's words should think, "Drink after you think about the world at least once." Father likes water best; I know the taste of the water. Water is very good. You should save as much money as possible when it comes to these things.
In my own home, there are problems. If beverages are left, then, without knowing, somebody takes them away. It happens in the morning, and that is no good. If you have nothing to do, then you just drink all the time and then you go to the bathroom all the time to urinate.
For what purpose? Why are you like that? This is a problem you have to think about. What do you think of this? Is it a problem you don't have to think about? You have always to think that you are wasting money. It is necessary for you to think about that.
Those who live thinking about the world, the coming generations, and the future will be remembered absolutely by the nation and by the world and by Heaven. They will never be forgotten. You should know that.
From that point of view, I gave instructions that you should think about these things. You should know that I am giving the right instructions. If water is not good for you, then you can choose one or two beverages instead of water and drink those.
4) Improvement of the Environment
You must improve the environment in which you live inside and outside of the house. These days I heard someone say that when they went across the East Garden K House near the bridge and entered the house, they saw people living like pigs. How come? I think I have to go and take a look at it.
You have to put everything in order. Even your clothes must be hung in a principled way. You should put men's clothes on the right side and women's clothes on the left side. Do you understand? When you hang your clothes, you should put men's clothes above and women's below. That is the principled way. You need training in everything. You are hearing these things for the first time, aren't you? You have to do things this way. Unificationists are different. If you put men's clothes below the women's clothes drawer, it is in violation of the Principle.
When you take off your clothes, you should take off your trousers first and then put your jacket above the trousers. You should not put your jacket on first. You have to be trained in everything. You should know how to put the environment in order through such principled ways of living. Men's shoes should be put on the right side; women's shoes on the left. Even if you live in a small house with only two rooms, you should put men's shoes above and women's below.
You must know that everything must be put in order according to the Principle. Do you understand? When you women put on clothes, in what order do you put them on? Do you put on the jacket first or do you put on the panties first? It is a principle for woman to put on clothes from a lower part. If they put on clothes from above is it or is it not the principle? Yes, you have to know all those things and put your living style in order. You must know that the Principle is also a philosophy of life.
I look at the meal tables of America, of Western society, from this point of view. From that point of view, they are not in accordance with the Principle. You have to think of all those things, centering on the standard of the Principle. You should always think, centering upon the idea of subject and object, so that you can adapt the style of living in accordance with the order of the universe.
Suppose there are two different kinds of things. Which do you put on the right side? When there are two things, you should put the subject matter or more expensive things on the right side and cheaper things or smaller things on the left side. That is the Principle. You should be trained in that way.
Likewise, you should put larger things in the center and smaller things in the surrounding area as objects. All should be balanced on such a standard. Even in the case of the fine arts, everything is in that way. When it comes to trees, the central part should be made higher or larger, and other things must be balanced. Everything is in that way.
You should have that kind of thinking, which can be applied to the laws of nature.
When you women put on your clothes, you put clothes with thick color above the clothes with thin color. Don't you wear red color clothes above? That is the reason of the nature for everything.
How about legs? You have to think of your legs in a correlative relationship. When you wear things with a lighter color, then you should put on something with a darker color so that everything is harmonized. Art develops this way.
5) The Issue of Residence
We will speak about the issue of electricity. You often sleep at night with the light on. You should not do that. If you become unable to sleep without a light, you should not sleep. That is an unhealthy habit. Those who sleep in the day-time are unhealthy too. You must be good at the management of electricity. When I go out, I took at the situation of the lights. When they are on, I put them out. You also should have that kind of habit. Even if you have come downstairs, if you think the light is on, you should go up and put out the light and come down again. You need to do that kind of thing. Especially if you go out, you need to do that absolutely, don't you? If all the 204 million American people live like that, how much are they wasting?
American people leave tap water on while they are washing their faces. Also, they leave the water on while they are using their toothbrush, washing their face and hands. But you are wasting water.
When you shave, you should use water and stop it. You should have that kind of habit. How about you? The question is how much waste you are causing. You must think how much of a wasteful life you are living.
Recently, I trained myself on purpose not to use water for flushing even when I use the toilet. In Africa do they have water for flushing? Do they have washing water? If Americans don't use wash water for one year and help the people in Africa, how great it would be! Even if Americans don't use washing water, God doesn't mind. What do you think? Even if your hands smell bad, still you should be like that. Do the members of the Unification Church go to bathroom ten times a day? If you go there once every two hours, it means you go to the bathroom twelve times a day. How much water do you use? If Americans stop using water for one day, 240 million buckets of water would be saved. 240 million buckets of water. How much money does it cost? Suppose one bucket of water costs 50 cents or even 10 cents; how much in all? 24 million dollars per day. How about for 100 days? Two billion dollars. In one year, six billion dollars could be saved and used for the sake of the world. If you give that kind of money to the world, think about this enormous saving. (117-149)
What is next? The telephone. When you receive a telephone call, you talk all day: one hour, two hours at a time. When I went to Belvedere, the monthly telephone expenses were about $4,800 dollars. So I scolded them, saying, "Who made the telephone calls? This must be improved." Then the expenses went down to $1,800 dollars. There was such a waste. You should not make useless telephone calls.
What do you think? Every day husband and wife talk on the telephone, saying, "I love you, I love you," in the morning, and they call again in the evening. It is not necessary. It is enough to say, "I love you" once in every month. It is better if you change to better ways by doing so rather than saying it every morning and evening. There is no meaning to saying, "I love you, I love you" every time. It is better to say, "I love you" seriously, even with tears, once a month. What kinds of things are necessary? Do you need false love in which you say "I love you, " while eating, or do you need true love? Even If you don't make a phone call, it's O.K. if you say I love you a hundred times a day. You should not waste money by making telephone calls to say, "I love you."
Look at this furniture. If only you maintain this well, then it will remain beautiful even after several years. But if you don't take good care of it, it will become bad within a year. The same thing can be said about a desk. If you use a desk violently, it will be broken.
You have to think all those things as precious. If they are precious, you should love them. You should know those things. When it comes to furniture, if you take good care of it, it will remain pretty even after one year. Don't you think so? You have to think in that way. You have to love furniture.
Does the furniture feel good when it gets hurt and has lost its original state? Do you also think it is a good thing to get old? Do you think it is good to have wrinkles, getting old? Don't you mind that? I make it a rule to use furniture without moving it often once it has been placed. I keep it in the same place. I hate to move it because it is balanced.
Women don't think of these things. They sometimes lift them up or break them. Women don't appreciate them as works of art. They don't think that way. They think furniture is like toys. They regard those things not as art works but as toys. What kinds of things are precious? You need to have that kind of thinking. That is necessary for you.
Pictures and all things are just like accessories. All toys are the same. When we observe women, everything they wear from the head to the bottom is fictitious. A necklace is also fictitious. All of the accessories are fictitious. Pictures are fictitious. But they are also necessary. In the case of animals, there are strong ones and weak ones. Usually stronger ones stay in a higher place and the weaker ones stay in lower places. Think in that way and you should know that you should adapt to that kind of structure. Expensive things are not necessary. Look at your own things and see what type they are. What types are you going to make? Looking at those things, you have to adapt yourself. You must manage those things well.
You must think about beautification. When you take your seat, you should think all things should be harmonized. You should think, "This is an artistic room," and you also should think, "I live in that room." That kind of thinking is necessary.
How to wear clothes is a problem. Is it good to wear beautiful clothes or not? Is it good to wear fashionable or unfashionable clothing? No button should be missing from a man's jacket. Also, the buttons should not be put on in a distorted way. It is not good that some people have four buttons and others only have three. That is absolutely not good.
In that case, even if you cut down one button, all of them should have three buttons. Women should know that. When husbands wear clothes, you must know that you have to administer them. Recently, here in America, people wear jeans. They should wear them like this.
Who does such a thing? It is for the commercial people to sell things and make profits. They make them large or small or long, short or wide or narrow. You should know that. It is a fashion.
You have to know that it is those business people who do those things. That's why those business people deceive you. You live, being deceived by fashion. We Unificationists don't like fashion. We go on the central road. The people in the secular world go up or go down, but we go straight. So, on the average, we don't lose.
We do a little bit of those things. When others take good care of their hair, we do a little bit. That is important. Fashions come back in approximately three years. After a couple of years the same fashion returns. Therefore, those who do no work and who just play waste their time. But in our case, when can we do that? When I buy clothes, I do it during the sales season as much as possible. In America, even if you don't have money, you can live. Rich people also can live. So, in order for the people who don't have much money to live a wonderful life, make use of sales.
In other words, if you buy on sale, you can always wear fashionable clothes. Do you understand? Prepare clothes for one year. When it comes to summer, the spring clothes are on sale. Even though the season is over, after a year you can always wear the spring clothes. You can always wear fashionable clothes. In that way, you can save money. Even if you buy clothes for two years, you can do that with the money equivalent to buying clothes for one season. This is how it is.
With the money equivalent to buying clothes for one year, ordinary people can buy clothes for two years.
The other day I went shopping with Mother and bought clothes on sale. I bought Italian-made clothes for $70. They usually cost $650. When I wear it, it doesn't look like a cheap thing. Do you understand? If you have clothes for two years, then you can wear the necessary clothes, no matter what the season may be, and with the same amount of money for one year. You can buy and prepare clothes for two years and still have extra money.
Father knows very well other stores in this New York area, which sell furniture, clothes, and other things. I buy things cheaply or in an inexpensive way. I know where I can buy those things in an inexpensive way. Therefore, people may say, "Reverend Moon buys all cheap things," but the fact is that I buy these things with less money.
One day I bought a coat for Mother. The price is usually $400 to $500. But because of the sale, I bought it only for $70 dollars. It has a very good collar, so since the collar was so good, I bought it for Mother. Although, it didn't look good at the beginning, gradually it came to look better. You should choose things like that. You should choose what you will not hate during the four seasons. The more you wear them, the better they become. Once I wear them, I always wear them and when I go out I feel very comfortable.
Take such a thing as a necktie. You should choose things you can wear throughout the year: winter, spring, summer, and fall. You should do that. It is necessary.
I am the kind of person who values clothes. My transportation is a Lincoln limousine, and yet I look for a McDonald's hamburger shop. Why? Because there are young people around the world who are working very hard at the risk of their lives for my sake. I should not be indebted. If you have debts, you decline and perish. If you borrow something, you decline. If you have debts, then there is no reason that the leader should be involved in the debts. If people have debts, the leaders who have sovereignty of the nation should not be involved. Since I know these things, I'm making desperate efforts not to have debts.
Therefore, our members who are imprisoned because of their underground activities in communist satellite countries maintain their positions at the risk of their lives. They are determined to die. How can I who know these things be wasteful? I would rather not eat at restaurants. I'm that kind of person.
Now, when you wear clothes, they are in a relative position. The American style of wearing clothes is like this. That is O.K. Then how about the Oriental style and Korean style? In the Korean style, we wear from above like this. But, what is the difference? There is such a difference between the Western style and the Korean style.
Now, you have never seen men put on clothes like this. Americans put on clothes by putting them down. What is the difference? Well, it doesn't matter how it is done, but when you put on clothes and use your fingers like this, how do your put on your trousers? When you put on trousers, you should put your right leg in first. It is better to make a relative relationship. When you put clothes on the upper side, you may put on clothes as you like. Since they are relative, you may put on clothes in whatever method you like. This is a principled way of living.
When people walk, their hands move in a relative relationship. First, if you move your hand like this, then you move your leg like this. So, no matter how busy you may be, you move your legs. You should move them in order.
For you who are supposed to go witnessing is it possible to change your stockings every day? It is necessary to take off your clothes quickly and put them in order. If the stocking for the right foot is used for the left, it doesn't feel good. So, put them in order; then it is easy to wear. When you wear your stockings, put your right stocking on the right leg. Then it feels good. Make it a custom. When you wake up in the morning, pick up the right stocking and put it on your right leg. Make it a habit.
When you go out, you should start from your right leg and when you come home, you should come with your left leg. From now on, you should make a rule for everything in accordance with the Principle.
Rules. Norms. We have to look at everything like this. All things are in pairs and in harmony. We should think like this. Don't you think so? These birds exist in pairs. All things must fit each other. When you put on your clothes, you should get accustomed to putting them on according to the laws of courtesy and Principle. I am not forcing you to do that. You must become round and able to deal with all things from a principled point of view.
7) The Shape of Clothes
Let's talk about the shapes of clothes in Western society. There are clothes for work, clothes to wear when one is a guest, and clothes for playing. If you do not adapt to that society, you will be regarded as a failure. Therefore, you have to put the shape of your clothes in order. These women who have their arms exposed should think. If a woman with thin arms exposes them, it's not good to look at. In that case you should only expose them to this extent. Otherwise, you don't look good when seen from behind. You should think of this. Those who are fat should wear clothes that make their arms look longer. Those who are fat should cover certain parts. The shape is essential. If you are fat and ugly, this isn't good. The shape is necessary. Those who are fat should wear thick, strong-colored clothes. If they wear light-colored clothes, they took fatter. Those people who are fat in the belly have problems walking. You should think of how to cover your stomach. Even if your tummy is big, the upper part should be bigger than the lower part. So, wear thick colored clothes.
Also, fat people should never make their heads look big. Their heads should look small and they must wear small shoes. If they make their head and feet look big, fat people look like bears. But, if even one part is small, people will sympathize and say, "Oh, still, your feet are small." Fat people should not wear big necklaces. They should wear small, thin ones. Earrings should also be small. Big earrings are not good. You should think of those things, even though I haven't complained about those things.
We must be decent in wearing clothes. When you button up, you should stop here. Men are the same. Men usually have three buttons. If you don't button them tight, you are a failure. If you close two and keep one button open, people will think you wear it for decency. But, if you open all these buttons, you are a failure and lose all decency and order.
Also, with regard to shirts, if you keep three parts open, it is a failure. When women sit down with pretty clothes, they should sit down after putting their clothes in order. You need to maintain decency.
Decency is important.
9) Harmony of Colors
Harmony of colors is necessary. Particularly, women need to harmonize the colors well. For women, harmony is necessary.
This morning I am wearing this necktie, but usually I don't wear neckties. I hate neckties. Why? It is because I know the reality that many people are dying. I am the leader of the Unification Church. I can't do these things. You should understand these things. It is substantial. We have to accumulate cent by cent for 1,000 years, so that our descendants can inherit our ways as tradition and proudly hold up their ancestor's name. You should know that. If you do so, you will become a flower in the garden of hope. How much does a necktie cost here? You should use the money for the sake of the world.
When I go to the countries in South America and Africa, I can't go just as I am. I must make preparations. Then I can be more persuasive.
For a man, there are various ways of wearing a necktie. To keep the tie from moving around and being in disarray, I use a tiepin.
Mr. Pak's pin is too high. It should be lowered and be kept between this line and this line. But if it is lowered too much, how would it look? It will look natural if placed in a one-third position. It shouldn't be too short. A tie should look decent.
When men work, they should work neatly. In my case, this part is higher than this. This comes from a habit I formed during the time in prison. I used to lift my right hand like this, which is now my habit. I need to keep this in mind. When a man goes out somewhere, you must keep your clothes neat. The translator should be like this. He shouldn't wear it like this. He should know his shortcomings. You should know your shortcomings.
What man does is similar to making movements representing the universe. When you go out to visit your wife, it is O.K. to go out in whatever fashions you like. But when you visit your parents or someone older, you should be prepared and wear you clothes neatly and decently.
Next, both men and women need shoes. Shoes are necessary. So, the question is what kind of shoes fit you well. You should choose your shoes according to your clothes. Usually we take off our shoes before entering a room. In the Orient, you take off your shoes. People are evaluated by their shoes. In other words, they are evaluated by how large their foot is. Since a person's physical body is this big, their foot is bigger than others. If your feet are bigger than average, that person is regarded as a thief.
By looking at the back side of the shoes and seeing how the shoes are worn, one can know what kind of person he is and the way he or she walks and what kind of personality and character he or she has. It is possible to know these things by looking at the way of walking and how the shoes are worn. Through the shoes, it is possible to know whether the person received an education. Both shoes must wear out equally in the same way.
Oriental people can find out by looking at the shoes how the person used and walked with the shoes. In the Orient people are very interested in the foot. When they get married, they look at the hands, feet, and face. In the Western world, the breast can be seen easily. But, in Korea it is hidden, like the hip. People are evaluated by looking at the hands and feet, and other outside parts of the body.
Next, the person is evaluated by the expression of the face, the way a person smiles.
That is why in China they had their feet made small. The aristocrats or nobles had small feet, and people were considered to be noble if they had small feet. I also have small feet and hands, although my body is big. Though my hands are small, they are thick. By looking at these things, you can evaluate that person.
For women these types are ideal, and for men, these types are ideal.
In the Orient, women had to be able to give birth to children. You can tell whether a woman can bear a child by looking at these things.
When we think of these things, you should wear your shoes neatly.
Also, when Western women wear high heels, we think they want to walk nicely. So, women should walk neatly when they walk. If they absent-mindedly walk like this, it is terrible. You may think those women who wear high heels cannot make love with men other than with their husbands, but I think otherwise. You have to wear shoes neatly and decently and love the shoes.
12) Putting Things in Order and Tidying Them
You must put everything in order so you can find it easily. In Jin is really great at putting things in order. She keeps her bed so neat that she doesn't want to sleep on it and sleeps in somebody else's bed. When I see that, I think good women should be like that. You should also think like that. You must respect the beauty of what you have made. One day I saw her sleeping in her sister's bed. Father was like that in the past. I would put everything in good order. So, if someone touches my desk, I can tell, even after a month.
Now that I live with Mother, I changed that custom a little bit, but anyway that habit of keeping tidy is important. Women should keep their rooms in good order.
Women must be educated in all these things. You, leaders! Some ask why Japan receives so many blessings. But that is because Japan keeps the environment clean and orderly. Evil spirits make us do evil things, and good spirits tell us to keep the environment clean and holy. Therefore, Japan could develop quickly because the good spirits came and helped. That is my understanding.
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