The Way for Young People
by Rev. Sun Myung Moon
Section 4. Human Relationships with Words and Things [Part 1]
1. Relationship with Humans
1) How to Relate with Humans
In our daily life, everybody has his or her own concept of good and evil. I think that you often experience the following. When you meet a person for the first time and just look at her, then you realize whether he or she is a good person or not. If you are a religious or spiritual person, you will realize that all the more easily. When you meet a person with your conscience, you will understand whether or not he or she is good, even if you meet him or her for the first time. You may have had such experiences in your religious life, especially if you have spiritual ability.
It is from our human relationships that we can recognize others as good or evil. This is better than any other means. Everybody has both an internal relationship and an external relationship. An internal relationship refers to a human relationship and an external relationship refers to a relationship with this secular world. Human beings have such relationships. (27-46)
2) Desirable Human Relationships
Let us examine human beings. One smiles gently, and another one laughs with a loud voice. There are many kinds of laughing. (46-285)
In your religious life, you should establish your position, where you stand. You should examine everyone as to whether he or she is good or evil to you, or whether he or she is a plus or minus to you. You must determine from the person's words and behavior whether he or she is plus or minus to you. In other words, you must examine whether a person is helpful for God's providence and for your religious life or not. (40-88)
3) Three Classes of People
In the fallen world we can classify human beings into three classes. One class of humans belongs to hell. Another class belongs to the middle world, which is located between the satanic and heavenly worlds. The third class of humans belongs to the Kingdom of Heaven.
An individual human being has a mind and body. The mind is not always spiritual; it is usually between the spiritual and the physical. Thus, there are three types of human beings; the physical, the mindful and the spiritual, who belong to the satanic world, middle world, and heavenly world respectively.
When you meet someone for the first time, you sometimes feel pleasant, and you are attracted to him or her in a moment. Why is it so? You are attracted to him or her because he or she is spiritually higher. You will feel naturally pleased to meet a person who has a higher spiritual foundation, which his or her ancestors have established. It is because you will benefit rather than lose by relating with him or her. You can decide whether a person is good or evil by seeing whether you benefit or lose from your relationship. In other cases, you don't feel pleasant or unpleasant when you meet a person. In yet another case, you feel unpleasant seeing a person. Everybody emits radiation, which affects the people around him or her.
Thus, you should correctly evaluate people. When you think that someone is good just by looking at him or her, you are already engaged in a give and take relationship, regarding him or her in the subject position while you are in the object position. From the principled point of view, when a subject and an object establish a complete reciprocal standard and are engaged in complete give and take action, God dwells in them. (50-258)
4) A Being in Connection with Ancestors
When you meet a person and feel pleasant, you naturally want to give him or her something and receive something from him or her. In the same way that an iron is attracted to a magnet, two persons are united as an invisible connection works behind them. God dwells in them when they have a strong connection between them.
Give and take action gives rise to a movement based on a center, and the movement spreads around the center. When a center is established quickly, the movement will last for a long time, but the movement will collapse easily when it takes a lot of time to establish a center.
When two parties are engaged in give and take action, God dwells in them. When someone feels it is pleasant to see another one for the first time, there is a connection behind them, the connection between their ancestors.
One of your grandmothers may belong to the Cho family and another one may belong to the Kim family. Thus, from the ancient ancestors down to the present parents, one's ancestors belong to various families. However, one has special connections to some families, and we can divide our ancestors into some classes. Then we can say that one is mostly connected with the first class of ancestors, say, the ancestors who belong to the Choi family, and then with the second class of ancestors, say, the ancestors who belong to Kim family, and so on. There are tens of classes in one's ancestors.
Even though I was born physically as the son or a daughter of my present parents, I am not merely a horizontal being of this age. The bloods of my grandfathers and grandmothers as well as those of many other ancestors are mixed in my blood. Six billion cells in one's body are connected with one's ancestors.
It is important for us to know from which ancestors we have mostly inherited our characters. Your uncle may belong to the Cho family, but he does not represent merely the Cho family. If his mother belong to the Park family, he has some character of the Park family. Thus, the present "I" was born as the combination of all my ancestors.
When you meet a person, say, Mr. Park, for the first time and feel pleasant somehow, it is because you have many Park ancestors. On the other hand, if you feel disgust from a person whom you meet for the first time, it is because ancestors of both parties were in an antagonistic relationship. Perhaps his ancestors did harm to your ancestors. Thus, our ancestors' conflicting relationships appear as repellent human relationship today.
Some persons are neither pleasant nor unpleasant to you. They belong to the neutral position. You can influence and move them if you want. They will be attracted to you, if you, as a subject, do your best to serve them with all your sincerity. Then, if they are attracted to you and come closer beyond a certain line, you will be able to guide them to go the same way you go.
If you want to witness to a person with whom you feel it is difficult to get along, you have to solve the problem of restoration. You cannot restore him or her for nothing. Standing in the position of goodness, you have to pay the price for him or her.
It seems that we are living together horizontally in this world. It is not true, however, seen from the spiritual and heavenly viewpoint.
There are mountains and valleys in our human relationships just as in the natural world. Thus, one goes the flat way, another descends, and the other ascends mountains.
You may think that all human beings are the same, but they are not. When one likes this, another likes that. Everyone feels in his or her own way. All these feelings are related with the historical background and spiritual connections. (50-259)
5) A Good Person
What is a good person? If you try to find only shortcomings in others, and if you accuse someone ten times for his or her ten shortcomings, you are not a good person. You should forget the shortcomings of others and evaluate the value of their good points rather than accusing their shortcomings. Thus, you can be related with others in the position of goodness, and you can guide them to happiness. They will follow you and be closely associated with you. If you just hate the shortcomings of others and judge them as worse than they are, you should know that you couldn't find goodness on earth.
Then what is a good person? A good person is one who loves even bad people; a person who sympathizes with those in sorrow as if he himself were in sorrow. If you become sympathetic with others and indemnify their sorrows and give joy to them, you can be a model of a good person in any situation.
How can you become such a person? You should transcend superficial, worldly habits and ideas. You should think, "I was born in order to change bad people into good people," or " I was born for the sake of others." If you think that is the mission of your life, you will be able to get rid of all evils, whatever difficult problems may arise in your surroundings.
You should not think that you have nothing to do with the evils of others. You should suffer from them, and you should pray with tears for others, and you should live with determination to indemnify their sins. Then you will become central figures to guide them. (34-130)
We should know who is a good person. A good person loves children, young people, and old people. In relationship to nature, he or she loves spring, summer, autumn and winter. That is a good person. (72-102)
2. Good Human Relationships
1) Loving Relationships
Today, people are indifferent to each other. They do not respect each other. Regardless of age or sex, they think it troublesome to relate with one another. Such people cannot have a spiritual awakening.
In God's providence of restoration, He does not need the Republic of Korea only; He needs all of humankind. He has a deep concern for all humankind. It is the most important goal in God's providence. We are gathered here in order to fulfill that goal. You should know that you should have the same concern for all humankind as God has.
True concern for all humankind should come out of our original minds. It should not be superficial. Then we can stand where the best connections and best relations are established. You should have sympathy with others who are in trouble and suffering as if you yourself were in trouble. If you love others ahead of anyone else, you will have a strong life force in you, with which you can overcome the most severe, wintry trial. A life force will grow in spring, and it will become the basis of life in the new world. (25-291)
The value of a person as a human being depends on how one relates with life and love, which integrate all sensations coming through one's five physical senses. Thus, it is important for us to establish human relationships and live a social life with love. If you are not in such a position, you are going backward; not even standing still. (32-19)
In the same way balls collide with each other on a billiard table, we meet people and engage in give and take action with them. In a soccer game, a ball is kicked, and it goes up and down, right and left, front and back. We have such human relationships centered on love.
What is religion? It is seeking God. Then what shall we do after finding God? We should go further into the depth of the love of God, shouldn't we? If not for the human fall, people could have reached that point and religion would not be necessary. Then what explanations are necessary for love? We can naturally realize parental love, conjugal love, and so on. We cannot be separated from love any more than we can be separated from air.
Do you have to go in a special direction to find air? You will find it anywhere. In the same way, you can experience love from your parents and from your loved ones wherever you are. (91-82)
2) The Fundamental Element in Human Relationships
We should decide how we should live our lives. We should associate with and serve the people, good or bad, young and old, without distinction of what we like or dislike.
You should think of what you have done to others before you judge them as good or bad. Water flows from higher to lower places. The air of high atmospheric pressure naturally comes down to the lower vacuum. Thus, when you stand in the lower position, others will come closer to you. That is the principle. (131-33)
You should be careful when you come in front of others and speak in front of them. You should consider their inner and outer situation. (42-300)
As a religious person, one should be united with God, and then one should be emotionally and horizontally related with all things and the world, centering on God's love. (82-275)
You should not relate with people with greedy ambition. (33-143)
3. We Are Sik-Goo (Family Members), Not Church Members
1) The Background of the Term Sik-Goo
For what purpose are we Unification Church members gathered here today? We call our members "Sik-Goo," don't we? What does Sik-Goo mean? It does not mean the one who eats meals. By Sik-Goo we mean those who have the connections of brothers and sisters; those who were born under the same parents' heart. We should have the relationship of brothers under the same parents. Then we inherit the life, habit, and tradition of the parents, and we have the life style that heaven likes. In this way family members come to be formed. (155-211)
What are requirements for family members? You have your position and situation establishing the relationship of above and below, front and back, right and left. Then you should bear your brother's tribulation as your own, your parents' tribulation as your own, your spouse's tribulation as your own. You should confront various difficulties, thinking, "Other's pain is mine."
If you accept the sorrow from your brother, his suffering will be dispersed. If you accept the sorrow from your parents, their suffering will be dispersed. We shall be closely related with each other, as brothers if we have the strong will to fight against the enemies who are obstructing our providential way. Then we shall be protected and guided by our brothers. It is the heavenly way.
Through the age of struggle on the individual level, the age of struggle on the family level, the age of struggle on the tribal and national levels, we have come to the age of preparation for the struggle on the global level.
Our life is not merely our life. All humankind and all the members of our family should harmonize with our life and march forward with us. Such a thing should happen. Then we are family members.
As family members, we live for our parents above and our brothers left and right. We live in order to build the kingdom of hope and goodness, a good nation and a good planet. In the presence of such solemn tasks, the storm of struggle will necessarily arise. Who will confront the storm? Our Unification Church members, namely our family members, will.
Today we who used to be strangers are gathered here hand in hand, young and old, men and women. We have the same blood lineage with the same God's heart. We have started, motivated by God, and therefore we should attain the divine result. (67-325)
2) Beings with Connections
The connections, with which you are united, centering on God, could not have been established in a few years. Behind such connections, there is a fallen, sad history and God's hope for humankind. You should not forget that you have gathered here with such connections and with the heart of longing for each other. (49-216)
What are the connections with which we were born? They are vertical connections. They have not been established based on ideologies; rather, they have been established based on God's heart and His ideal of creation. They are firmly connected with the original human nature. You have to understand the absoluteness of such connections. (49-206)
3) The Points Family Members Should Keep in Mind
You should not say the kind of things that would hurt family members or disturb their religious lives. (18-43)
You criticize or judge other family members from a distance, thinking that you cannot get along with them. You must not do those things. (19-138)
I cannot tolerate such a thing as someone criticizing and deliberately attacking other family members. Where should we begin to love? We should begin to love by loving each other. We have gathered here from north, south, east, and west under the same connections, and therefore we should love each other. Our Unification Church is proud of such connections behind its members. Without them, we have nothing to be proud of. (49-62)
There should not be struggles in the Unification Church. You have gathered here to love each other. You should seek to love rather than to be loved. From whom do you learn to love? It's from Father. When you met Father, you naturally felt like loving Father. You felt love that you could not help but give to others. You should give such love to your brothers and sisters.
Then God will give you back as much love as you gave to others many times over. It is because parents wish their children to love each other. If you love brothers and sisters in the same way you love God, the door to the Kingdom of Heaven will be opened. You should go together with brothers and sisters just as you want to go with Father.
In this respect, it is family members rather than God or Father who will guide you higher and more quickly to heaven. The one who has love greater than parental or conjugal love can lead people as the supreme subject of love.
You should make desperate efforts to train yourself to go to the Kingdom of Heaven. If you are in the Abel position, you should subjugate and lead the Cain-side people. Otherwise, your Kingdom of Heaven is merely a kingdom inside a well. It is not the Kingdom of Heaven where you can freely associate with people vertically and horizontally.
It is a global age today. A white man, a black man, and a yellow man are three brothers. You may wonder whether you will be happy living together.
There is no conflict among the various races in the Kingdom of Heaven. The Kingdom of Heaven is not the place where only one race can enter; it is the place where people are allowed to enter depending on their achievement of love-how many people they loved.
It is stated in the Bible, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God." (Matt 5: 9) You should keep company with the children of God. If you keep company with the children of Satan, you will feet fear and anxiety. You should think that your brothers are more valuable than you. If you live for the sake of your brothers, you will naturally go to the Kingdom of Heaven. You will be welcome everywhere and you will become a central figure.
The way to the Kingdom of Heaven is to realize brotherly and sisterly loves based on parental and conjugal love. The key to enter the Kingdom of Heaven is to give and receive love for joy. You should keep it deeply in your mind that brothers and sisters are more valuable than you are. (66-125)
4. The Reason We Should Love All Humankind
1) The Reason We Should Love People
Arrogance and stubbornness are our enemies. They are natures of Satan. Instead, we should be modest and harmonious. There is love where there is harmony, and you should harmonize with everyone. If two persons are united, something greater that what they have will arise.
Jealousy is another satanic nature, but here you should keep in mind that you should not be arrogant and stubborn. (37-132)
The first commandment is, "Thou shalt love the Lord, thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind." The second commandment is, "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." The first commandment says that you should love God, and the second one says that you should love your neighbor, meaning all humankind. It is God's will that all humankind should live in the world of love. Therefore, He will not accuse us if we love people more than God. (136-141)
Why do we have to love each other? It is because if we do not love, God's love cannot go around. The love between subject and object must be there before vertical love can appear. (34-240)
2) How Much Should We Love People?
What is a saint? Is he a person who eats well? If he a person who fights well? No, he is not. A saint should love all people as his parents, his brothers and sisters, and his children. Parents suffer when their children are sick. A saint will suffer to see humankind in trouble. It is the way of a saint to love all humankind and invest all he has into them, forgetting his pride. This way of a saint has been inherited as the standard of morals throughout history, beyond ages and national boundaries. It is the philanthropic spirit, the love for humankind. (186-74)
How much did you love people? Have you ever loved a person at the risk of your life? How much and how many people have you loved? Your heart of love will be formed depending on how much emphasis you put on loving others. (73-78)
You should walk the way of faith based on God's love if you want to inherit the eternal connections. Then you will bear fruit in the presence of humankind. Our association should be greater than any other association in loving people. Our association has been established by God's will rather than by human will. Therefore, it will bear fruit of love in the presence of the world.
In winter, leaves fall. When spring comes, trees turn green and we feel hope. Likewise, if you keep loving all humankind in whatever difficult situation you may be in, you will become a hope and a representative of heaven. When you love others you should not only love youths; you should love young and old and all human beings.
You should love and respect old people more than young people. Especially you should love and have sympathy for old people who cannot work and need care. But today's tendency is for young people to ignore old people. That should not be the case. (25-289)
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