Blessing and Ideal Family Part 2
by Rev. Sun Myung Moon
8) The Cooperation of True Husband and Wife
A wife shouldn't think that she fulfills her responsibility by just preparing a meal when her husband comes home from work. The most important thing is to share a time of confidential talk of love at the dinner table. If she comforts her husband's hard work of the day with the whispering sound that she had in their first meeting, his fatigue will fade away and their conjugal love will become deeper.
When Father, verging on seventy years old, wants to go out to the ocean, Mother prepares all his equipment with her whole heart. She even prepares the supplies needed in case he stays out overnight and prays for the accomplishment of Father's will. What a beautiful helper and supporter she is!
Father many times feels sorry for Mother in her mission. As a woman in her prime of life, she must desire to do many things. When Mother sleeps in fatigue, I offer a big bow to her in tears. Such heart is necessary. The room which is filled with flowers in full bloom and fragrance is a happy room. God dwells in such fragrance of flowers. When her husband goes to bed right after work, snoring loudly without eating dinner and without saying anything, a wife should be able to hear, above the noise of his snoring, the sound of tears from her tingling heart. Father's wish is to see that kind of family. If I cannot see such a family, my suffering will be in vain. All of you should know this.
People must live together. For what? For a certain purpose. In order to feel love in living, we should live together. Every existence, regardless of being man or woman, has the same purpose. Man and woman should not move according to different purposes. They are to become one. When a husband works outside, his wife should work inside. Even though their bodies are different, their minds should be the same.
When the husband goes out to took around his assigned area, the wife shouldn't act like, "See you later. I've got to sleep now. I'm so tired." Until her husband comes back from his tour, her heart should make the same effort he is making. Children also should wait until their father comes back from the mission area and they have to pray for their parents' well-being. Something absolutely inseparable should exist between them. That is the fortune of heaven and earth, the fundamental form centering upon universal love. If it breaks, there will be nothing but despair.
Women in the Unification Church should clearly know that man is subject and woman is object. On the foundation of their oneness, they as a union can serve their new subject. In other words, their union becomes the object in order to make a love relationship with God. Love does not come unless there is a subject-object relationship. Is man plus or minus? (Plus.) What about woman? Is woman plus or minus? (Plus.) You answered both sides are plus; that's why you just want to receive love instead of giving. When man wants to give to woman and woman wants to give to man in a perfect plus and minus relationship, their love will circulate smoothly. The sickness of American women is due to the selfish desire just to receive love from the husband. The master of the American family is woman. Men are overpowered by women in the family. The man dresses the woman instead of the woman dressing the man. It is a total inversion. When the husband comes home from work, the wife who has spent idle time at home commands the man to do things. If the wife greets her husband with a joyful, welcoming heart and invites him to eat right away, happiness dwells with the family.
The wife should make her husband successful; that is to say that she should be his great supporter. Be the perfect man in substance, heart and living. The place where God's love blossoms is the family.
In order for a man to be successful, his wife should be excellent. Now is the time for women to be open to God's fortune. It is the time for the miserable women to be happy. Because Father clarifies things with Principle, women are happy. As long as you are born as a woman in this precious time, you should be the wife of the bold soldier representing history.
Women should go the way of woman in response to the heavenly law. You should be able to die if your husband asks you to die together with him. You will live together in the spirit world even though you die here. There will be a way for liberation as long as you are absolutely obedient to your husband's order. Within the fallen world, the way of liberation will always remain for those who observe the law of absolute obedience to the principled morality.
Even though you are so extremely beautiful and capable that you can lead a comfortable life on your own, you should follow your husband regardless of any suffering as long as he is centered upon God. No matter how much you are persecuted, if you can bear a child who can love God and the universe and can control the world, you should be able to endure until the end of the world. Even though you've got the ugliest man in the world, if God dwells in your family and you and your husband are devoted totally to Him, a saint will appear through your blood lineage. If you offer the sacrifice of three generations with the utmost sincerity to God, a saint will surely appear in your family. You should think that your husband represents all the husbands of the world. When you give birth to a child in accordance with this principle, he or she will be a great figure.
When you treat your husband as a saint and recognize him as the representative of the Lord, you will be able to sacrifice your life for his sake. On that foundation, a great figure who can restore the nation and the world will be born.
God must love woman more than man. Man is like God's body and woman is in the position of his object. Woman, who was created at the last moment as the utmost masterpiece, is in the position to receive more love from God and eventually she is to be a mother. Children in general also prefer their mothers.
Father thinks of something in the far distance and Mother thinks of things close at hand. Woman is the realist. Raising up children is a big job. When a woman is pregnant, she loses her taste for food, and suffers. Because she suffers, God acknowledges her. Why does God make a pregnant woman lose her appetite? If his wife doesn't lose her taste for food, the man will be indifferent even though she is pregnant. A woman also grabs God's attention more when she is pregnant.
Because women have to go through so many difficulties, such as the period of pregnancy and delivery, God gives deeper love to them. Why did God make it so difficult? If the process of bearing a child were easy, she wouldn't understand love. When she gives birth in suffering, she will cherish her baby and will be able to feet God's heart. In this respect, woman is created as God's object of love. In bearing a child, a woman gets to know parental love, husband's love and child's love. Woman is so precious because she, more than man, is connected to love.
Father cannot compete with Mother in loving a child. Because the mother pours out power more than anyone else and suffers more than anyone else in bearing a child, she more than anyone else loves the child.
In this respect, woman occupies the eminent and precious position in the realm of emotion. No matter how much the father loves his baby, he doesn't know love as much as the mother does. Therefore, women will go to the Kingdom of Heaven of heart. Understanding this, it is not too bad to be born as a woman. God is fair.
Woman should make the fragrance of love spread out to the far distance like the morning-glory flower.
Even though a husband tells his wife not to intervene in his business, should she not intervene at all? A wife can stand as equal in position to her husband. If the husband is absent, his wife should be able to replace him.
A wife shouldn't be indebted to her husband.
In settling a family, the woman's role is vital. She should do an excellent job.
A wife should have the attitude to accept her husband's opinion 100%. She should create so strong an internal bond to her husband that she accepts his actions 100% as well. She should go east when husband orders her to go. If a woman doesn't follow where her husband goes, she is not a wife at all.
You should think carefully what to say to your bridegroom at the first moment you offer your life to him. A sister who is determined to be completely obedient to her husband with such a serious heart will surely receive his love. Have you thought about that? The wife should be the person who can be responsive for the sake of her husband. Such a quality is necessary.
Your ears should be able to go over the rugged mountains. How will you do if you are matched to a man who curses you every day? You should be able to say to the husband who is cursing you right after breakfast, "Please wait and curse me after eating lunch," and at lunch time, "Curse me only after finishing dinner." If he continues after dinner, you should be able to say "Please sleep first and curse me later." Then Satan will go away in forty days because there's no fun in what he is doing.
You are not supposed to expect only good things. Can you bathe in the sun 24 hours? No. You need the night, don't you? It is Principle that the high is followed by the low.
A wife shouldn't be sad because she cannot wear nice clothes or because her household is poor. Your husband already knows your heart. Deep love and priceless treasures are hidden in his heart of feeling sorry for you.
I want to advise wives to awaken their husbands from sleeping, accusing them, "Why do you always sleep?"
Wives want their husband's happiness more than their own because it determines their mutual relationship. Woman is born to welcome man and man is born to welcome woman.
You should feel the family standard keenly. Man is subject and he should stand in the center. The subject should stand in the position of subject, not that of object. The center should be protected and it shouldn't be at an odd angle. He is in the position representing God.
Motive and cause start from the subject. Happiness and joy originate from the subject. The man is responsible if there is family discord. The responsibility for the fall is assigned to God first, to Jesus second, and to the Holy Spirit third.
When the ideal world is established, man and woman must become equal. Then who is to be the subject? Equality is possible when we eternally take absolute responsibility. The subject doesn't press the object hard to take responsibility. After fulfilling his responsibility as a subject, he can call the object to account. God doesn't call human beings to account until they become perfect. In other words, He is tolerant until the perfection of human beings.
In that respect, if man is subject, he should be responsible for everything. The representative who can inherit all the responsibilities and who can fulfill the public commitment becomes the subject.
Man has an active and conquering nature.
Man has to work. What kind of work? He has to pioneer something. Human beings are called the Lords of creation. The word "Lord" sounds as if it refers to a man, doesn't it? How would you feel if a little beardless woman with little fist and slender face stood up shouting, "I am the Lord of all creation?" Think about it. No matter how many times she shouted, her voice would sound feminine. What if a man with a somewhat thick voice shouted, "I am the Lord of all creation." How would you feel? Even all the women would agree with his claim after hearing his voice.
When men are fighting, if a woman tries to intervene, saying, "Go away," how do you feel? But when a man with his fist clenched firmly says, "Hey! Beat it; get outta here," at least it sounds authentic.
In this view, it is better for man to take the first position as the "Lord." The Lord is supposed to be different from others; he is supposed to carry at least one more item than the other creature. Man carries one more item than woman: his moustache. The moustache makes man qualified as the "Lord." Heavenly Father is truly mathematical.
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