The Words of the Ablong Family
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The Words of the Ablong Family |
Dear Brothers and Sisters,
Our daily Hoon Dok Hae tradition is a big help to overcome the hardships and difficulties of educating and guiding our children. Those of us who have adolescent children may be in a roller coaster experience of parenting them. But by practicing this Hoon Dok Hae tradition, however, things may be kept in their controllable or manageable stages for a very good amount of time and reason.
Personally, I feel that following the example of True Parents' family in educating their children like waking them up in the early morning to do daily and special traditions is very important. We see more of this when we see the True Family waking up early and doing Hoon Dok Hae together.
True Father said, "The family is the micro-church. It should be the agency of Heaven. It should be the family that God wants to visit. First, a family should be a place where many people can come and go. The harmony among men is most important. Heavenly families should be united into one.
The family is the smallest unit for entering the Kingdom of Heaven, it acts as a training center and a study aid. (True Families: Gateway to heaven, p.16, par. 2)
If we just try our best to practice what True Parents have shown to us by example then we can also naturally educate and protect our children. I think this is the reason why we worry when we see our children not being able to do the church traditions like we do. I think that it is our original mind or conscience that is asking us why our children can't close or open the day with us in prayer much less pray before eating, pray leaving home and after coming back home.
Just as each of our bodies are God's temple (1Cor. 3:16), the family is True Parents' substantial temple of our faith. Our True Parents teaching should be realized in our family. Some, if not most of us, may say that "Our homes are not church centers." But when we really come to think of it based on the Principle, the Ideal of the Family do have a lot of influence on the idea of having a center. We have a mother figure, a father figure, children figures in a center, just as in the family. Every member of our blessed family is a member of the church.
If we can teach members and other people about True Parents tradition, then we should have a special reason why we can't let children do what we are doing. It is a disservice to God and True Parents if we can't teach them what we teach other people.
Our blessed children are church members, too. So we should educate and train them to do Hoon Dok Hae, prayer, offer Jung Sung conditions and other basic traditions. If we have trained them when they were very young then we don't have to worry much about this by now. Those who have been trained in the early years will not find traditions difficult to do. In fact, blessed children will be the one to ask you about doing it. They will feel that their day is incomplete without doing our daily traditions just as we were trained in the church. They may not have to do fundraising or witnessing or any sort of mission the way we did but the basic traditions like morning and evening prayer will just be part of their daily routine. These basic traditions are the foundations for greater missions or challenges ahead of them. If we haven't done that, then it is actually a big challenge on our part to let them do it now because it is too late to start bending a big tree.
True Love goes beyond the demands of work, stress and multiple missions and responsibilities. External things in life are nothing in front of love. When we love someone, we do anything and everything to make what we want or achieve for that person, internally and externally. When we love someone, it is natural to find a way to accomplish our hopes and ideals, dreams and aspirations, schedules and activities, and even recipes to cook without sacrificing that love. Work, stress, multiple missions and responsibilities should not make us avoid doing this basic module of our life of faith. It is hard to practice this but we should realize that the Kingdom of Heaven starts within the family next to our individual selves then the society, nation and world. It seems hard because we are doing multiple responsibilities but let us not forget that this is the most basic part of True Parents' teachings.
True Father said, that we
"should stress from now in the
field of education is tradition, education and practice. You must
know the tradition. You must set the tradition of the new nation. You
must educate focusing on the tradition. The three goals of our church
are tradition, education and practice. You cannot educate without
tradition.
(Sun Myung Moon's Philosophy of Education, p. 45 par.
3, p46. par. 1)
Those of us who are stressed out or so tired should think about how to accomplish the responsibility of being a loving parent. We should worry when we say anyway God is always in our family and they are blessed children, so God will protect them either to pacify our anxiety about this point or to escape responsibility. Parents are their children's substantial God in the family. We should think that God's body in the family is the parents. Parents are responsible for the education of blessed children at home. There are many things to accomplish in life, but this is, what I think, is the essence of following our True Parents. It is hard to be a parent but this is the best experience we could ever have in this world.
Parents love is the happiness and ideal of children. It is sad to note, however, that a few couples have not fully matured in their relationship as parents. Even though, parents practically grow with their children, some have been apparently stagnated or undeveloped because of personal and historical problems involved. Problems like miscommunication and even resentment. These problems are not other people's problems but they affect the whole church or movement because "We are one body of Christ." (Rom. 12:5-6)
If couples go beyond their individual perceptions and feelings to take care of each other no matter what then great things can happen. It is just a matter of time, consistency, humility and unconditional service as an expression of love and concern for each other. Each individual in the conjugal relationship is basically a partner for growth and contentment in life. No ifs and buts. If the wife fails, the husband fails. However, if the husband succeeds, both of them do. They should feel success when they see each other, staying up together despite the odds or complexities of life.
True Father said that the family is the micro-church. It should be the agency of Heaven. It should be the family that God wants to visit. First, a family should be a place where many people can come and go, the harmony among men is most important. Heavenly families should be united into one.
Growth and development of children always bring added challenges to parents. Financial, personal, social and even technological life becomes cumbersome and more challenging at this stage of life. Responding to all these challenges would have us read True Parents and Dae Mon Nim's guidance about raising blessed children. It will also lead us to research how adolescent problems and issues are resolved by other couples and families.
Here is an article that I have read today. It's not very perfect but I certainly learned from this. I hope that those of you who have adolescents will learn from this one, too. You can read the article by clicking on this link:
www.indiaparenting.com/teen-issues/255_1481/dont-embarrass-your-teenager.html
Yours,
Rafael E. Ablong