Creating a World of Peace - The Thought and Works of Sun Myung Moon by Joon Ho Seuk
Volume 2 - The Ideal Family and True Love as the Source of Peace [Part 2 of 5]
2. Order And Position In The Family
A. Natural Order in the Family
Family relationships are the most fundamental ones in our life, for through them we learn how to love. Our birth family and the family we create form permanent sets of caring relationships and challenge us to grow in heart. The energy of love needs to be cultivated in certain directions in order for it to blossom into true and lasting love.
Reverend Moon points out that there are three types of order in the family. Firstly, the vertical order between the generations links children, parents, grandparents, great- grandparents, and so on. Secondly, horizontal order links people of a similar age, such as brothers and sisters, husband and wife, and cousins.
Thirdly, individual order arises from our personal axis of core values. Maintaining these three types of order ensures harmony in the family. Losing this order results in imbalance and disharmony as, for example, when people abandon their family to pursue personal satisfaction or gain.
Three Key Relationships
From "True Family and True Universe Centering on True Love, Founders Address, 15th Anniversary of The Washington Times, Washington, DC, June 16, 1997.
People should exist in the relation of parents and children, husband and wife, and elder and younger siblings. And these three relations meet at one central point. There can be only one center. Above and below, right and left, and front and back should not have different centers.
If the central point is different, then the balance of the relationships between above and below, right and left, and front and back will be broken. Eventually above, below, right, left, front, back and the central point all together comprise seven positions.
Thus, the number seven represents all elements uniting to become one centering on God, with perfect True Love. Together, these seven elements form a complete sphere and eventually a family structure of harmony and unification.
As a spiritual teacher with a background in electrical engineering, Reverend Moon often describes the order within the family as being analogous to order in the universe. Just as in the human family, the harmony found everywhere from the microcosm to the macrocosm is based on clear order and position. Electrons revolve around the nucleus of an atom because of the balance between centripetal and centrifugal forces. On a much larger scale, the balance of these forces governs the movement of the planets within our solar system and our solar system within our galaxy.
Although the structures found in nature and society is similar, there is a vast difference in how order is maintained. Natural order is governed by physical laws whereas social order is ideally maintained by the force of character, guided by morals and ethics.
Reverend Moon teaches that people with a mature heart and conscience will live according to the principles of true love. Only by internalizing these principles and putting them into practice can we achieve our potential as human beings of good character.
This growth and maturation that takes place in the family allows us to experience each of the three kinds of order. Thus a son becomes a brother and then a husband, father, grandfather, and so on. A daughter becomes a sister and then a wife, mother, grandmother, and so on. As we pass through each new stage in life, we acquire additional qualities and experience greater fulfillment.
The Family Sphere
From "Everybody Wants True Love Chicago, Illinois, November 20, 1999.
We are the sons and daughters of God, the parent who is the origin of true love.
Parents are the highest masters of love for children. The parent-child relationship is vertical, and the husband-wife relationship is horizontal. The lines of these two relationships should cross at right angles.
The relationship among siblings forms a third dimension, a front-to-back axis. When all are equidistant from the center, and are freely circulating in love, their relationships form a sphere.
That is why all beings existing in love, and the universe as a whole, are spherical. The entire universe achieves balance centering on these relationships. All love is united and achieves a peaceful dynamic harmony in the central point of this sphere of love relationships.
This center, where all these relationships intersect, is where God resides. If we picture this three-dimensionally, we see that God is the ultimate origin of love, life, lineage, and conscience.
In the God-centered family, vertical and horizontal loves are united as one. Such a family will multiply to become a clan, society, nation, world, and cosmos of love. The fundamental center, though, is always the one God.
B. The Three Axes of Family Bonds
Reverend Moon describes this familial order as a sphere with three axes. The vertical axis connects family members who are in an elder/younger dynamic, such as between parents and children, or grandparents and grandchildren. This axis represents a hierarchy of generations.
Original Family and the Family of Today
From Sermon given at Belvedere Estate, Tarrytown, NY, March 8, 1987.
There are three layers in our families: grandparents, parents, and ourselves.
Together they can form a circle. If you have only two points, then you cannot make a complete circle. In groups, in a company or social organization, there are always three layers: one's superiors, oneself, and one's subordinates. These comprise front, center and rear. With three directions, you can have spherical movement; moving in all different directions, a sphere will eventually be formed.
As a result, the most ideal shape in the entire universe is that of the sphere. It is not pointed or angular. If someone asked you the shape of love, you should be able to say instantly, "It is round.
When things are truly round, they don't hurt each other. They don't have any sharp edges. If you are perfect and everyone else is not perfect, they have sharp edges. When they come at you and smack you, you can turn them away with the slightest change of angle, like a ball floating in a pool of water. No matter how you poke your finger at that ball, it will just bob away.
The two horizontal axes (front and back, right and left) represent relationships between people within a generation. The first horizontal axis establishes order among people of the same general age and generation, with the older ones in front and the younger ones behind. It connects older and younger children in a family and elders and juniors among peers.
People in traditional cultures typically defer to those who are older than themselves and help care for their juniors.
The second horizontal axis links husband and wife side by side. This relationship is different in quality from the axis between older and younger peers. Regardless of who is elder, husband and wife freely share in the same benefits and responsibilities. Also, there is an exclusive intimacy between a man and a woman who have committed themselves to each other for their entire lives; and only the husband/ wife relationship embraces sexual love.
These three axes -- parent / child, elder / younger and husband / wife form a sphere. We are meant to live for the sake of the people linked to us by these axes. The center of a family is not a person but the junction of these three axes.
In true love, each of these axes intersects with the others at a 90-degree angle, and everyone is equally close to the center or core. Equality in the family means that each person receives the optimal love corresponding to his or her role in the family. Reverend Moon teaches that when such a family is established, then this becomes the dwelling place of God.